“What?”
“He didn’t want kids. Ever. We fought up until the very day he died because the second I told him I was pregnant, his response was that we should give the baby to you and Scott.” I pull out a chair and sit, not liking where this is going. “So, we argued because I wanted to keep them and he wanted to give them to y’all. And it’s not that I didn’t want you to have kids, I did, but they were my babies, you know? It just didn’t seem right.
“The day he died, I told him that if he wasn’t going to change his mind about the babies, then I was leaving him. That’s why he was agitated during the game. Things were really bad, Sylvia. And all because of one of the best things that could’ve happened to us.” She shakes her head, lost in her memories.
I can’t believe things were as bad as she’s saying. Neither of them let on that their marriage was anything but great, and while it seemed that Lizzy was excited about the pregnancy, it never seemed as if Roger wasn’t.
“Anyway, he died and turns out, I couldn’t bear to do it alone with him gone, so y’all got the girls like he wanted in the first place. And when I realized I might be pregnant, I was thrown back there. Marc will be happy, I know he will, but what if he isn’t? What if something goes wrong? This will be a good thing and all I feel is terror because of everything that happened last time. I couldn’t even enjoy being pregnant because I did nothing but fight with Roger and then I lost my girls who I wanted more than anything else.” Lizzy chokes on a sob and starts crying. “It was my decision, I know, and I’d make it again in a heartbeat, but—”
“I understand,” I interrupt. That’s why she wanted to talk to me after all. She knew I’d get where she was coming from. If she wanted those girls as much as I wanted children, then I can only imagine how hard it must have been for her to give them to us, especially when she was grieving the loss of her then-husband. And now, here’s her second chance. It probably seems too good to be true. That’s certainly the way it seemed to me when she kept telling us to adopt her girls.
“Listen, Lizzy. Marc isn’t Roger.”
“I know that,” she snaps, the tears stopping immediately.
“Shut up and let me finish. Marc isn’t Roger. Your marriage with him isn’t the same as your marriage with Roger. Your life isn’t the same as it was. Things are different. Take a deep breath, remind yourself that you’re a stronger person than you were then and that things will all work out. You’re not living in the past anymore. You’re fully in the present and looking toward the future. Not that it needs to be said, but if Marc gives you any trouble, you already know that between me and Scott, he’ll get a good ass-kicking.”
She nods. “I know.” Her voice cracks, so I know something
else is bothering her now. “I only have one spare bedroom and that’s for the girls.”
“It’s okay to change it. They know they are welcome at your house. It might even be more fun to sleep in the living room. It could be like camping out. Or, convince Marc to move into a bigger house. There is a solution for everything, Lizzy.”
“You’re right. Thank you.”
I smile. “You’re welcome. Now, what’s the real reason you didn’t want Scott and me at your wedding?”
Her shoulders sag. “It’s going to sound bad.”
“I don’t care. Just tell me so I can stop obsessing over it.” At this point, that’s the only reason why I want her to tell me.
“Well, we decided to invite only either you and Scott or Noah and Meredith. I told Marc to invite them because one, that’s the closest thing to a family he has and I knew he’d want them there. Two, it was my fresh start. I didn’t want my last husband’s family there. Not over the only family Marc has. So, we asked them to go instead.”
This girl can be so dumb sometimes. “I would’ve understood that, too.”
Her body visibly relaxes. “You and Scott have always been too good to me. I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. I don’t always know how to deal with things like this.” And she can sometimes make it worse than what it is, too.
“It’s okay. Go find out if I’m going to be an aunt and let me know once you’ve told Marc.”
“It might be a few days, but I’ll let you know. If I am, I want to surprise him somehow. If I’m not, then I’ll be back here, if that’s okay?”
“Of course.” If anyone knows what it’s like to hope you’re pregnant, and I’m sure Lizzy is hoping now that the idea has been planted in her mind, it’s me. And if anyone knows what it’s like to hear that you’re not after having that hope, it’s me. For a brief moment, I’m envious of Lizzy. She’ll be pregnant. I just know it. She’ll experience a doctor telling her she is and she’ll be able to tell her husband about what they’ve created. That is something I will never be able to do. Accepting it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with in an instance like this.
Once Lizzy leaves, I take a deep breath, look around at all the things that show my house does in fact have two little girls in it who are mine, and I silently thank Lizzy for that. It helps the envy go away. With that, I get back to cleaning the house with a smile on my face even though when my girls get home from school, they’ll destroy it all over again.
“What’s up, my brother?” A arm slings around my shoulders and I shove it off.
“We’re not actually brothers-in-law,” I remind Marc.
“I know. But you still consider Elizabeth your sister-in-law, which means I’m your brother-in-law.” He’s the only one she allows to call her by her full first name. Everyone calls her Lizzy, but him.
“What do you want?” I’m extra grouchy toward him because even though Lizzy said he wasn’t the reason she was upset this morning, I’m not convinced. What else could upset her if not him? Lizzy is like a sister to me and I’ve been extra overprotective over her since my brother died. She needed someone to look after her, so I did. Sylvia did as well. I won’t stand for someone hurting her, even her husband and my teammate.
Marc’s expression sobers. “Have you talked to Elizabeth lately?”
Clue number one that he doesn’t know she was coming to the house today. “Why?” I’m certain Marc would rather I stay out of their relationship, so it’s surprising that he’s asking and sounding hopeful that I have.
He shrugs. “She’s seemed jumpy lately and I didn’t know if maybe she’s talked to you or Sylvia.”