“Sweetness?”
I snap my head to the right to see Jake walking towards me. I look back down at the milky ice cream as I feel Jake’s arms wrap around my shoulders as his chin rests on my shoulder.
“I heard you scream. What’s the matter?”
His voice is gentle and I feel as if he really wants me to tell him what is going on. I just don’t want to put another burden on his shoulders.
“Just a bad dream,” I tell him. He reaches down to take my ice cream and leaves for the kitchen. Jake returns and holds out a hand for me to grab. I do so and he leads me back to the bedroom. We lie down and cuddle together with my back against Jake’s chest.
“Want to tell me about it,” his breath caresses my ear.
I squeeze my eyes closed, but that image pops up again. I roll over to face him and squeeze into my favorite spot.
“Sometimes, I just wish I could forget it all. It haunts me no matter what I do.”
Jake holds me tightly to him as he takes a shaky breath. I close my eyes and feel the pulse in his neck against my forehead.
“I want to help you, but I don’t know what to do.”
“Just being here helps.” I feel as if I am lying, although I am not. It is true that his presence helps me, but sometimes, I wonder if its enough. I focus on the heat coming off of Jake’s body and allow myself to fall asleep.
My leg is bouncing up and down as I sit at the high-rise table at Coffee Beans. Bells jingle and I glance up to see Kyle walk in the cafe. Kyle is the type of guy who will help you out when you need it but won’t ask any questions. His way of thinking is if you want him to know, then you’ll tell him. Otherwise, he won’t ask.
He waves and walks over to take a seat across from me. I hand him the black coffee that I bought earlier for him.
“Hey Em. Happy Birthday,” he says with a nod of appreciation as he takes his coffee.
“Hey. Thanks.” I cradle my coffee in-between my hands. Kyle reaches out a hand and places it on my knee to steady it.
“What’s going on? Why are you nervous?”
None of my new found friends know of my past. However, I do know that Kyle’s mom went through the exact same thing that I’m going through right now with the nightmares. It came up one evening when we were hanging out. I don’t know if I should proceed with my plan or not because I feel as if it would be an act of betrayal to Jake. I take a deep breath.
“How did she get rid of the nightmares,” I ask, looking down at my coffee.
Kyle clears his throat in a way that conveys he knows what I’m talking about. He squeezes my knee and I glance up at him as he returns his hand to his coffee. Curiosity and concern fill his eyes as he gazes at me. When Kyle answers, I know this was the right thing to do.
With a deep breath, he says, “She went to therapy and talked with my dad about it. I know that her therapist told her to always be upfront with her feelings and what she was going through. That was especially important with my dad because he went through it with her. He might not of had the nightmares, but he still went through a grieving process. Her therapist told her that being open with him should help a lot. I believe that did help her the most.
“Her therapist wanted her to write down her fears and her nightmares so they could analyze it. Mom didn’t like that though. Instead, she just talked it through with my father and her therapist. Please tell me you aren’t going through this Emily.”
“Going through what,” I hear Jake voice behind me. He kisses the back of my head and starts to massage my shoulders, which are extremely tense. Kyle glances back and forth between Jake and I.
“Nothing love. I’ve got to get back to work. My break is over.”
I stand up, give Jake a kiss on the cheek and leave the two men. Work fuddles by as Kyle’s words cloud my mind. After messing up two orders, my manager ordered me home. After cleaning up, I walked out back.
Instead of going home, I text Abella, Hannah, and Kyle to let them know that I am ready. They have something planned for my birthday.
Minutes later, Kyle pulls up in front of the cafe. I slide into his car and off we go. Honestly, I’m not in the birthday mood. Nonetheless, I allow Kyle to whisk me away. Not caring where we are going, I close my eyes and don’t open them again until
The moving car stops, it is clear that the party has already started. Music vibrates its way outside and Kyle and I get out of the car. I loop an arm through Kyle's and we walk inside. Immediately I'm handed a drink. Maybe this is exactly what I need to forget about today.
The alcohol falls effortlessly down my throat and someone hands me another. Kyle gives me a puzzled look, but I ignore him. After about thirty minutes of heavy drinking, I wonder why Jake isn't here. Pushing through the crowd of people that I vaguely know, I find Kyle.
Slumping against him, I yell over the music into his ear. He points a finger across the room and in walks Jake. One look into his eyes and I have to turn away from his powerful gaze. My heart is aching and I want nothing more than a shot of whiskey.
Normally, I wouldn’t drink anything strong so the alcohol goes right to my core and it doesn't take long before I'm tipsy.