Whatever It Takes (Bold As Love 3)

“Bye,” I say flatly.

“We still on for lunch?” Emily asks.

“Yeah,” Kyle replies before walking out the door. Cold air rushes inside when the door opens and thankfully the door seals shut to protect us from winter’s presence.

Semi-jokingly, I ask Emily, “Sweetness, you aren’t going on a date tomorrow are you?”

Sweetness doesn’t take the joke. Instead she defensively says, “No! Would I flaunt that I’m cheating on you in front of your face? No. I’ve got to take a lunch break tomorrow anyway. Kyle simply offered to eat with me.”

“Hey, I was just messing with you Sweetness,” I say in a gentle voice.

“I know. I’m just tired.”

Emily rests her head on my shoulder as I take another sip of my coffee. I suggest asking her coworker if she can close up instead. Emily looks up at me and the happy, hyper facade fades away. Her eyes are sad from both exhaustion and lack of sleep. Taking my advice, she hops off my lap and goes to convince the other girl to close up. Minutes later, Emily returns wearing one of my hoodies. I grab my coffee, take her hand, and we walk around back to her car.

“How’d you get here?”

“A girl from the party dropped me off.”

“Oh,” Emily looks down at her feet that are stepping on tiny gray pebbles. I stop beside the passenger door of her car and hold out my hand for the keys. Sweetness doesn’t hesitate handing them over. I open her door before walking around to drive my sweet Emily home.

I get her back to the house safely. I unlock the door hearing the click as I turn the key. Inside, I run a hot bath for Emily and instruct her to sink down into the tub and relax. Almost zombie-like, she does so. Leaving her in the tub, I go to the kitchen to fix her something for dinner.

“I’m not hungry,” she calls out as if reading my mind and actions.

“Have you ate?”

The silence that is her answer forces me ahead to make her supper. Being the superb chef that I am, I open a can of soup and heat it up. Once it’s ready, Emily magically appears from her bath and takes a seat at the bar.

“Eat up Sweetness.”

Rainbow striped socks cover her feet and one of my old, long t-shirts hang from her shoulders. I ask, “Aren't you cold?” Sweetness just shakes her head and continues eating. I leave her in the kitchen and get myself ready for bed. I put on a pair of pajama pants, brush my teeth, and wash my face. Walking out of the bathroom, Sweetness walks in. I lean against the door frame to watch her brush her teeth.

Her shapely legs lead up to an hourglass figure and her brown hair is tangled into a wet mess. Even in this disheveled state, Emily stills looks beautiful. Leaning over the sink, Emily spits and rinses. Without a glance, she walks past me and climbs into bed.

Oh no. What’s the matter?

5

Emily

Exhausted. That one word sums up how I feel in its entirety. Going to school all day and working all evening on just a few hours of sleep with a hangover is not my cup of tea. My eyelids are heavy and my feet are sore from standing so much. Let’s not forget the emotional roller coaster I’ve been on all day. One minute, I’m fine and the next it’s like ‘Bring Your Baby Everywhere You Go’ Day.

A thousand questions run through my mind. Who would the baby favor the most? Jake or me? Would he have my brown eyes or Jake’s green eyes? Would he be a she? Would my baby sleep all night or would she pull an all nighter? What color hair would my baby have? Would it be black and straight or brown and slightly curly? Or black and curly? Straight and brown?

I’ve got to stop. Having the baby right now would be terrible timing. I squeeze my eyes shut as a tear falls against my will. Terrible timing would be so much better than this ache in my heart. An ache that will never go away. I want nothing more than to hold that plush teddy bear against my chest and cry myself to sleep.

However, I don’t want to share that with Jake. Not yet. The bed sinks with Jake’s weight and seconds later, I feel his arms attempt to turn me around to face him. I hold my ground. He worries so much as it is. Jake doesn’t need to find me crying over something that he seems to be having an easier time dealing with. Does that mean he doesn’t think about it as much as I do? That he is actually happy instead of heartbroken?

Jake’s voice sinks into my ear.

“Sweetness, what’s the matter?”

My throat constricts and I know that if I open my mouth, I’ll choke on tears. Jake finally rolls me over to face him and I slam my eyes shut to avoid looking at those green beauties.

On cue Jake says, “Aw Sweetness” as he wraps his arms around me and pulls me closer to him. His voice is full of love and it rips my heart to shreds but the anger still burns within me. I scream at Jake as if a volcano is finally erupting after months of rumbling in wait.

“Why aren’t you an emotional wreck? Why do I feel like I’m going through this alone? Why did this even happen? Why couldn’t you have had a damn condom? I shouldn’t be going through this right now Jake!”