I try to sleep, I really do. But this crap with my father is bugging me. Since I can't run, I turn in Jake's arms and shake him awake. He was snoring softly and it turns into a snort when I wake him.
“What's the matter, Sweets?” he mumbles with his eyes still closed.
“I can't sleep.”
Jake looks over his shoulder at his alarm clock. “It's three in the morning.”
“I know.”
“C'mon, Sweetness. Just close your eyes and let's go back to bed.”
“Jake,” I half whine. “I can't sleep. Wake up, please.”
His eyes peer out under hooded eyelids. “Did you want to talk about it or did you just want me to be awake too?”
“There's not much more to say other than it's still bothering me.”
“That's because you need to talk to Mike and settle things.” He takes a deep breath. “Sweetness, if I had the chance to talk things through with my dad, I would. Believe me when I say that that is what you need to do.”
“I'm sorry.”
“Don't worry about it. Now can we go back to sleep?”
I hug him to me and that is exactly what we do.
Around noon, my father shows up, wanting to talk. We sit on Jake's porch steps and everything is awkward. Dad runs his hand over his face and then looks at me.
“Honey, I'm sorry. I never planned on telling her. That's not my story to tell, but somehow your mother kept coming up in conversation and the more I avoided it, the more she thought I still had feelings for Judy. I only told her so she wouldn't think that I did.”
“That doesn't make me feel any better about it.” Sounds like Cherish has a bit of a jealously or insecurity issue.
Dad rests his hand on my knee and says, “I know, hon. I didn't know she was going to mention it to you either. Cherish wants us all to get along and that was her way of trying to ensure that.”
“Well, it was a shitty way. She didn't have to say anything about Mom.” I'm still mad and I want him to know that.
“Honey, give me a break here. I don't know what more you want me to say.”
“I don't care what the reasons were, Dad. You shouldn't have told her everything you know. A simple, 'Her mom was a bitch and very mean to her' should have been good enough and if it wasn't, that's Cherish's problem to deal with. Every time I'm around her, she's going to look at me and feel sorry for me. Every time, I'm going to know that she knows. Every single time, Dad. Every. Single. Time. Did you tell her about the baby too?”
Now, it's his eyes that look depressed and heartbroken.
“Tell me, Dad. How did that come up in conversation?” I watch as he squeezes his eyes shut. “You know what, it doesn't matter. I don't care. We're fine, Daddy, but if she ever mentions any of that to me, I'm going to blow a gasket.”
He nods and hugs me tightly. “I'm sorry, honey,” he repeats.
“It's fine,” I hug him back.
A few minutes pass before he releases me. “You're still going to let me help y'all move, right?”
“Yep.”
“Good. I've got to get back to work, but I'll talk to you later, okay?”
“Okay.”
36
Jake