“And I wasn’t, not really. There was simply something missing.” He put his hand over hers. “I was missing roots. Which sounds foolish considering how I just told you how my family grounds me.”
“There’s a big difference between coming from roots and finding your own place.” Mari gazed into his eyes. “I know I’ll never have the former. I never knew my real father and my childhood was a nightmare. But…but I think I’ve made a place for myself here.”
“I know you have. I know it because I could see it from the beginning. You belong here. You fit. You fit in a way I never seemed to.” He looked around the cottage. “I can see you within these walls. You’ve made this into a home, one that is only yours.”
“It doesn’t mean I’m not lonely.”
“Are you? Lonely, Mari?”
She bit her lower lip and nodded slightly. “Yes, yes I am. At least I was, and never knew it. You changed that for me.”
“I never expected to find you, you see.” He grabbed her hand, lifting it and kissing her fingers. “And when I did, I still didn’t believe in it. I didn’t trust in it. I had feelings for you but I pushed them away, pretended they weren’t real. I told myself it was temporary and that I’d go back to Italy and I would be fine. And then you told me you loved me.”
“I do love you.”
He looked down then, for several seconds. When he lifted his head, he said simply, “How you humble me, Mari.”
He leaned forward and rested his forehead against hers.
“You, the one who should be afraid…you’re the one who has taught me. You’re my miracle, Mariella. And I’m terrified you’ll get up one day and realize I’m not good enough for you.”
Tears clogged her throat. She couldn’t imagine being anyone’s miracle. Not after where she came from. After all she’d endured.
“I fell in love with you, and I thought you only needed me because of your stepfather.”
She swiped a finger beneath her lashes. “Oh Luca, how could you think that?”
“I wanted to be the one to make you see, but then you did and I couldn’t bear the thought of you with anyone else. And I knew you deserved more than me and nothing made sense. Until you were gone yesterday, and it all became very, very, clear.”
“It had nothing to do with Robert and everything to do with me,” she assured him. “You were the first person to see beyond what he’d done to me. The first person to make me forget and make me feel like it didn’t matter. The first person to make me feel like the real Mariella. You could never disappoint me Luca. Never.”
“Which brings me to the next…The Cascade.” He rested his elbows on his knees, his hands on the outside of her thighs now. She smiled; when he’d arrived he’d had a penchant for touching that she couldn’t stand and now she couldn’t get enough.
“I’ve grown weary of all the travel. I have a villa, but I’m rarely there. When I was younger it was exciting. I never wanted to settle down. I thought I had life by the tail. But things change. I changed. I started to hate having to drop things at a moment’s notice. I enjoyed building the business—being here with you and re-imagining The Cascade was wonderful. And then…then my father called the morning after you told me about Robert and said I was being sent to Paris right away.”
A wistful smile fluttered on her lips. “That was why you acted the way you did?”
“There was so much going on with me. I was suddenly involved with you on a much deeper level than I was prepared for, and it scared me. I wanted to show you that none of it mattered to me. And then on the other hand was my father telling me I had to leave and I resented the order. I’d put him off the day before and it didn’t go over well with him. And I wanted to make a change and didn’t know how, and it was all tied in with these feelings for my family and for you.”
It all was starting to make sense.
“I was certain that leaving was the best thing. I didn’t want to be in love. I didn’t want to put myself in the position of letting someone hurt me.”
Mari couldn’t believe she’d ever have that kind of power. Yet here he was, clasping her hands, telling her how he felt and with every passing moment the crack he’d opened in her heart grew wider.
“I’ve never been in love before either,” she admitted. “But it came down to knowing I’d regret it for the rest of my life. I had to tell you. And I had to ask you to love me back.”
His tongue slid out to wet his lips and Mari’s pulse thudded.
“I want to kiss you right now,” he murmured huskily, “but I need to tell you the rest first.”
“Then hurry.”
She breathed the response and again she felt the tug between them, the one she hadn’t imagined all those weeks ago.
“I spoke to my father. About Fiori, about my discontent, about you. And we talked about my mother.”
“You did?”