Chapter 1
Shannyn Smith heard the door open, but didn’t dare tear her eyes from the column she was adjusting. “Good morning,” she said to the figure in front of the reception counter. There was a glimpse of muted green in her peripheral vision as she input the last series of numbers. “I’ll be right with you.”
She turned in her office chair, put a stack of patient files on the desk, and clicked the mouse, minimizing the table and bringing up today’s appointment schedule. Of all days for their receptionist to call in sick, forcing her to fill in. She had monthly reports due. “And you are?”
When no one answered, she lifted her eyes. And the world started to spin dangerously. Dark hair. Green eyes. The khaki colour of army combats.
Jonas.
“Sergeant Kirkpatrick to see Ms. Malloy,” he answered brusquely. But she knew he recognized her, too, when his Adam’s apple bobbed up, then down as he swallowed hard.
“Jonas,” she whispered. That was all. She couldn’t bring herself to say more, not with him standing in front of her as if he’d materialized from a dream.
Six long years. Six years since he’d said goodbye to her. Six years since he’d been transferred to Edmonton, leaving her behind and never looking back.
“Hello, Shannyn.”
His words were cold and impersonal. Shannyn knew she couldn’t expect anything different, nor did she want to. It had been so long since they’d seen each other. He’d moved on. Perhaps even married. Just because the shock of seeing him made her heart give a little flutter, didn’t mean his did the same. And even simply seeing him now suddenly complicated everything.
A counter separated them, which was a good thing, Shannyn realized. On the heels of her shock came an irrational spurt of pure joy in knowing he was alive. Despite how things had ended, she’d wondered at times where he was, or if he’d been killed or wounded. The elation of seeing him in the flesh shot through her veins. Yes, it was good that the reception counter was there. If not, she’d have been tempted to jump up and give him an impetuous hug of relief anyway. That would be vastly inappropriate. They were old lovers, a flash from the past. And that was all they would remain. She’d worked too hard to build her life after he’d moved on, so she remained firmly in her seat. He certainly hadn’t cared enough to keep in touch, had he? Not a single letter or phone call. Right now it shouldn’t matter in the least that he was standing in front of her.
Except it did.
“You look well,” she managed, trying a professional smile that fell a little flat as she encountered his stern expression.
He looked amazing, in fact. His hair was military-short, but still thick and sable-colored. His eyes were large, a beautiful shade of moss green and with thick black lashes. When they’d met, it had been his eyes that had been the clincher. It had been his eyes that had stayed with her all this time, making it impossible for her to forget completely.
His tall, firm body was dressed in everyday combats, nothing special, even though he was neat as a pin. She noticed the three stripes on his sleeve. When he’d gone back to Edmonton, he’d been a Private with his eyes set on being an elite soldier. The best of the best. Obviously his career had progressed. Time had passed.
“Is Ms. Malloy running behind?”
Her weak smile faded and she recoiled. That was all? She hadn’t expected a tearful reunion and didn’t want it either, but pleasantries would have been appropriate under the circumstances. Some acknowledgment that he remembered her.
Clearing her throat, she looked back at her book. “About ten minutes, that’s all. You can have a seat in the waiting room.”
He turned from the counter without a word, walked towards the blue padded chairs, and Shannyn stared, her stomach tumbling.
He was limping.
A million thoughts flooded her brain all at once. The overriding one was that he’d been injured, and momentarily all her resentment at his non-existent reception evaporated. Somehow, somewhere, he’d taken fire and blood—his blood, had been spilled. In that split second, she imagined it leaking out of his body and soaking into the dry desert earth. Where had he been? In the Middle East, like so many of the Canadian troops? Africa? It didn’t matter. He was back now…and not okay.
The last she’d heard, he’d been stationed in Edmonton with his Battalion of the Princess Pats. So why was he back at Base Gagetown after all this time?
She stared at the back of his head, her earlier work forgotten. She could hardly go up and ask him about it, could she? He’d already been cold and dismissive. Hardly inspiring a heart to heart between them.
She discovered it was a conversation she didn’t want to have. After years of wondering what it would be like to see him again, to tell him the truth…it was surprising to discover it was not what she wanted. First in her mind was simply the preservation of the life she’d built for herself.
She’d done what she had for good reasons. If she forgot that, if she were tempted to engage with him, everything would change. The shock of seeing him face to face made that abundantly clear. Everything she’d done in the past six years—her silence, her night schooling, running this office—it had been for the best of reasons. She owed nothing to the cold stranger that had suddenly appeared today. Injured or not. He was the one who’d left her behind. He was the one who had decided his career was more important that what they had together.
“Shannyn. You okay?” Carrie Morehouse, one of the therapists, put a hand on Shannyn’s shoulder. “You’re in another world.”
“I’m so sorry.” Shannyn straightened and exhaled. “What do you need, Carrie?”
“Mrs. Gilmore’s file. Are you sure you’re okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
At that moment Geneva Malloy’s voice came through the far door. “Sergeant Kirkpatrick? I’m ready for you now.”
Jonas stood and wi