Back in the Soldier's Bed

How could she now explain that her father was here and wanted to see her? In her heart, Shannyn knew he would leave again. Maybe not next week or next month, but eventually he would leave, and Emma would be fatherless again. How was that fair? She put her hand on Emma’s curls, feeling the warmth radiating from her scalp. Every single decision she had made had been to protect Emma from upheaval. She’d been so afraid and uncertain she’d tried to play it safe. What a mess she’d made of it now.

“Mama? Can I play on the slide now?”

Shannyn looked into her daughters eyes. They were so like Jonas’s and since seeing him again, seemed even more so. Being with him, even through their arguments, only served to remind her how much she’d invested in him so long ago. And how much she’d invested in their daughter in the years since.

In the end she couldn’t give the words voice. “Yes, you go play, honey.” She took the empty popsicle stick from Emma’s sticky hands and kissed her cheek. Emma went back to playing and Shannyn watched from the table. And for the first time since she’d found out she was pregnant, she really had no idea what she was going to do.

“What time’s your lunch?”

Shannyn knew the voice even though the words were clipped and economical. He didn’t waste any time. Nine-fifteen and he was calling already.

“I get a break from twelve until one.”

“Meet me at the lighthouse at noon.”

“But Jonas…I…”

She heard loud noises slamming in the background as he cut her off. “I’ve got to go now, but twelve o’clock at the lighthouse.” Shannyn heard a voice shout presumably behind him somewhere before the line went dead.

Her hands trembled, not with fear but with anger. He said he was going to let her handle this, but all he did was make dem

ands left and right. When to tell Emma. When to meet. She should ignore his missive and stay right where she was. But that meant he might come to the office and confront her there, and a public scene was unacceptable for their clients. Damn him for putting her in such a position.

He was expecting her to tell him that Emma knew about him and plan the next step. It would have been easier to tell him over the phone and not face to face. There was no way she could explain it so that he would understand, but she was going to have to try.

She was waiting outside the white and red structure, looking over the water when he stepped up behind her.

“We’re in for some showers.”

She turned and caught her breath.

He was wearing his uniform trousers, but his blouse was missing and he stood before her in an army-issue T-shirt. And oh, he filled out every cotton inch. Flat where everything should be flat, a wide chest and broad shoulders that led to arms with muscles that dipped and curved. His boots made his six-foot-plus frame even more towering. His size made him more attractive to her, not less. She wished she didn’t find him attractive at all. All that lean fitness, paired with his handsome, if uncompromising, face, was a tempting combination. Not tempting enough to make her forget how he’d hurt her, though. Thankfully his interest at the moment was focused on Emma and not her. One complication was enough.

She swallowed, chilled by the sudden puff of cool air preceding the dark cloud coming down the river. Goosebumps shivered up her arms and she folded them around herself as thunder rumbled low, still miles away. Even though the sky directly above was blue, the water seemed discolored and white caps dotted the surface.

“Yes, it looks that way,” she managed to reply.

He held out a brown paper bag. “I know I interrupted your lunch break, so I grabbed something on the way.”

Shannyn stared at the bag, recognizing the familiar logo. “You didn’t.”

A smile crept up his cheek and she realized it was the first time he’d really smiled at her, a smile that connected. It moved from his lips and thawed the ice in his eyes as he admitted, “Of course I did. You can’t get a hamburger like this overseas, heck, not even in Edmonton. And I brought lots of napkins.” He held out his other hand, revealing the white stack.

He led her up the steps to one of the benches that lined the perimeter of the lighthouse, reaching into the bag and handing her the foil-wrapped sandwich. “I got extra cheese on yours.”

Shannyn smiled back, secretly pleased that he remembered another one of her favourites. She hadn’t had one in ages. “I suppose you got double pickles on yours,” she teased. Sliding the foil pocket back slightly, she took a first bite and sighed in appreciation at the juicy beef and tang of the condiments.

“Mmm.” She let the sound vibrate through her lips as she swallowed and put the sandwich down on her lap. “I haven’t had one of these in a long time.”

“We used to eat a lot of them, way back when.”

She used her napkin to dab at her lips; it was tasty but messy business. She wrinkled her eyebrows, surprised he made such a casual reference to their past after the resentful tone of their last meeting. For a brief moment as their eyes caught and held, she got that tumbling in her stomach, a lifting and turning that she’d almost forgotten. Perhaps it was brought on by nostalgia of what had been, but not completely. Part of it was a pull to the man beside her now. Tall and strong and more than a little enigmatic. A man who made her wonder what was simmering underneath. That was not good news at all. Attraction would certainly complicate a messy situation even further.

“Yes, we did,” she answered, the words coming out slightly breathy.

“It was a good summer.”

That summer had changed her life. And not just because she’d gotten pregnant. But because it was the first—and only—time she’d been in love.