Back in the Soldier's Bed

Shannyn lifted her chin. “You haven’t inspired a whole lot of trust yourself, Jonas.”

He took his hands off the wheel, turning his body so he was angled on the seat. He winced against the sudden spurt of pain in his thigh. She thought he’d betrayed her in some way when he’d left her. Maybe that was just as well. They were certainly miles apart now.

“I will see Emma. You will tell her about me, and we will, together, come up with a time and place for me to meet her. Because if that doesn’t happen, Shannyn, you’ll force me to take legal action.”

All the color dropped from her face and he regretted that he’d had to resort to such tactics. He wasn’t sure if he could even go through with such a thing. He knew it made him sound cold and unfeeling. And he wasn’t. The problem was he felt too much these days. Felt so much that at times it overwhelmed him. He pushed away the emotion. She was the one forcing his hand, not the other way around.

“You wouldn’t,” she breathed.

“I would,” he returned. “Don’t test me on this, Shannyn. I want to do this amicably. I really do. But that’s up to you now.”

The windows had steamed up and he started the engine, cranking up the defrost button. Within seconds a circle of clear glass expanded until he could see outside. The rain was moving downriver, and he turned on the wipers, clearing off the windshield.

“Buckle your seatbelt. I’ll drop you off at the office.”

When he pulled in front of her building, he put the truck into park but left the engine running.

“I’ll expect your call very soon, Shannyn. If I don’t hear from you by the end of the week, you’ll be hearing from my lawyer.”

She got out and slammed the door without saying anything.

He pulled away from the curb, heading back to base. He was determined to get to know his daughter, and he was willing to bluff about lawyers and judges to do it.

But he hadn’t counted on how much it would hurt to see Shannyn, too.

Chapter 5

“Honey, remember the man at my office the other day?”

Shannyn closed the book she’d been reading to Emma and snuggled the pajama-clad body close. She couldn’t put this off any more. She had no doubt that Jonas would find a way to see Emma, and it was her job to make sure Emma was okay with it. More than okay.

“The tall one that looked at me funny, right?”

“Yes, pumpkin, that man.” Shannyn wasn’t surprised Emma remembered; she had a sharp memory. “I have something to tell you.”

Emma turned her face up at Shannyn expectantly. Shannyn didn’t know whether to smile or cry. How could she make Emma understand something that she herself did not? This perfect little face, the creamy skin of youth, devoid of lines of worry that came with age and a loss of innocence. Lines like she’d seen around the corners of her own eyes lately. She wasn’t twenty any more and this wasn’t a whirlwind romance.

Shannyn had done everything she could to protect Emma, and yet here they were.

“Emma, that man…” She paused, tucking Emma close. Her voice caught on the rest of the sentence. “That man is your daddy.”

Emma pulled away slightly and her mouth opened. “My daddy?”

Oh, honey. Shannyn took a deep breath, willing the right words to come.

“Yes, pumpkin. He didn’t know that you were born, so seeing you…well it was a surprise to him.”

“He didn’t know I was a baby?”

“No, sugar. His job took him away before you were born. But” —and this was the hard part— “he wants to know you now.”

“Mama,” Emma whispered, a smile broadening her face at the brilliant news. “I thought he forgot.”

Shannyn wrinkled her brows. “Who forgot what, honey?”

“Santa. Last year I asked him for a daddy but I didn’t get one and so I thought he forgot.”

If ever there were a moment that Shannyn truly regretted what she’d done, this was it. She’d thought she’d done such a good job as a single mother but knowing that her precious baby had asked Santa Claus for a daddy broke her heart. She only hoped that somehow Jonas could live up to Emma’s expectations.