Back in the Soldier's Bed

He pushed further forward, taking his other hand off the mat and sliding it behind her other ear, forming a perfect cradle for her head as he opened his mouth, letting her in.

It was sweet perfection, better than the one in his living room. That kiss had been fast, new, and fuelled by anger and frustration and surprising need. This time they were both going into it knowing what was coming, and it showed. No rushing, but a willing coming together, soft and accepting. Soon her knees ached and she leaned slightly, curling into his lap while his hands adjusted her head to the right fit.

And still the kiss went on.

He moaned into her mouth, the sound vibrating through her like a string that had been plucked. Her arms curled around his neck and her weight shifted.

He stiffened, going perfectly still before letting her go and resting back on his hands again.

His eyes closed, his mouth no longer soft with passion but tight with pain.

“Oh Jonas, I’m so sorry,” Shannyn gasped, sliding off his lap and kneeling beside him. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“It’s okay.”

“What can I do to help?”

“You’ve done enough.”

She recoiled as if slapped, sliding backward and sitting back up on the bench.

Jonas pushed away and got up, less than graceful after the bump to his injury.

“I need to get changed.”

Sitting on the low bench, his scar was nearly at Shannyn’s eye level. She dragged her eyes away and looked up at him. “Why does it sound like you’re blaming me?”

“Maybe I am.” He started to walk away.

“We need to talk about this.”

“You’re awfully fond of talking.” His words came back to her even as he kept going towards the door.

She ignored his bitter tone. “We can’t just leave things this way, Jonas.”

He stopped, didn’t turn around but she saw his shoulders rise and fall in a frustrated sigh. They both knew that avoiding each other wouldn’t work. They had to clear the air.

“A cup of coffee. That’s all I have time for this morning.”

A cup of coffee would do if that’s all he’d give. At least it would get them out of the office and somewhere neutral. So much of their time lately had been on his turf or hers.

“Sold. I’ll meet you out in the office when you’re ready.”

When he came out minutes later, she grabbed her purse and hustled from behind her desk. She didn’t trust him not to leave without waiting for her.

“There’s a Timmy’s around the corner.” As they emerged on to the sidewalk, he thumbed in the general direction of the popular coffee chain.

But there it would be too easy to get a coffee and go their separate ways, and Shannyn wanted to hold on to him a little bit longer.

“There’s a place I know on Queen that makes great iced cappuccino.”

He paused, looking again at the familiar coffee shop and back at her.

“All right.”

Jonas followed along, this once. Kissing her had been a mistake, he realized. Both times. The first time he’d been angry and frustrated and remembering all too clearly what it had been like to leave her at the end of that summer. And this morning…this morning had been madness. He knew what folly it was to kiss her again and he’d gone ahead and done it anyway. Slid his hands into that soft hair and pulled her close.

He knew better. He should be putting more distance between them, not kissing. No matter how he felt about her, the one thing he was sure of was that this would all end badly. It would be better for everyone to stop it all right now. She knew it too, and he was angry with her for putting him in such a position. She’d initiated the contact, the kiss. And now he was going to have to put a stop to this sort of thing ever happening again.