The only other option was that he was here for her. And that was...unbelievable. Considering how they’d left things.
She opened the door, curiosity getting the better of her.
His gaze swept over her, top to bottom to top again, and a smile bloomed on his face. “You look wonderful,” he said. His voice held a note of reverence that touched her deeply, and she bit down on her lip. And in the next moment she was in his arms, in the middle of the biggest bear hug she could ever remember.
It was a shock and confusing as heck, but she went with it, because it was so damned good to see him again and hold him close. The scent that was uniq
uely Bran—soap and aftershave and sea air. How could he smell like the sea after sitting on a plane?
“You feel so good,” he said close to her ear, sending shivers down her body. “God, I’ve missed you.”
He loosened his hold and she leaned back so she could see his face, trying not to be so glad to see him. “What are you doing here? Is Rose okay?” He’d cut his hair, she noticed. Not super short, but the shaggy locks were tamed and his beard was precisely trimmed. It was sexy as anything.
“That little bean is just about perfect. She’s very close to rolling over.”
Oh, bless him. He called Rose a little bean. Why did he have to be so...everything?
She wilted in relief. “Okay, good. Because I thought for a minute you’d come to tell me that...” She hesitated. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t bring stuff like that up.”
“No, it’s okay. She was really sick, but she’s okay now. Full recovery. And that’s not why I’m here. But maybe we could go inside and close the door? It’s hot as blazes out here, and you’re letting all your lovely cool air out.”
He wasn’t wrong, so she stepped back and once they were clear of the threshold, shut the door. It was a relief to be out of the midday heat.
“Do you want coffee? I just made some. It’s likely to be strong now. I poured the water in my press the moment you knocked.”
“Coffee sounds great.”
She led the way to the kitchen, which was about a quarter of the size of the one in his house and still held a small dining set. Heart pounding, fingers trembling, she got two mugs out of the cabinet and then pushed down the plunger in the press, pouring strong brew in each cup.
She looked up at him. “There’s milk in the fridge.”
His gaze held hers. Coffee and milk had been the catalyst on that last fateful day. But now he calmly went to the refrigerator, took out a carton of milk put it on the counter.
“I’m sorry, Jess. For all the things I said that day.”
“Me, too. I mean... I knew we had to end, but that wasn’t how I wanted it to happen.”
“Do you think it ever would have been parting with a kiss and a fond farewell and a ‘thanks for the memories’?” he asked. He came a step closer. “Because I think it was always going to be messy. I’m not sure it can be avoided when two people love each other.”
She was holding out his mug for him to take when he said those words, and suddenly she couldn’t move. Her hand started to shake. He reached out and took the mug and then set it down on the table.
“You heard me right. You said you loved me that day, and I did not. I didn’t think I could. I thought it was impossible. But the truth is, I was already in love with you and too scared to admit it to myself. It was easier to say I’d never love anyone again. There was protection in it.”
“You weren’t ready. I knew that. It’s why I had to go.”
“I know, sweetheart. I know.”
This wasn’t happening. He wasn’t here, in her kitchen, saying all these wonderful things. Panic threaded through her veins. She’d thought she’d known what she wanted. But it turned out she didn’t know anything. Oh, how smug she’d been.
“What changed?” she asked, trying and failing to keep the tremor out of her voice.
“Rose. And Jeremy. And me being a lonely, grumpy man whose closest relationship is with his laptop. And I wouldn’t even have that if it weren’t for you.” He took her hand. “Come, sit. Let me explain, and then you can decide what you want to do with me.”
Oh, she knew what she wanted to do with him. That hadn’t changed. But this was about more than their physical compatibility. It always had been.
He held her hand as she across from him. “When Rose got sick, Jeremy came for me. He was a wreck. He’s my best friend. Of course I was going to be there for him. And walking into that hospital made me face a lot of things. But it also helped me realize that I’ve healed a lot. Jennie and Owen—they’re a part of my past that will always be in my heart. But I can’t keep living there. It’s not living at all, and after I met you, I discovered I actually do want to live again.”
“Oh, Bran...”