She nodded. “I’m sorry... I shouldn’t have bawled all over you.”
“It’s okay. I’m glad.” He stood back and held her upper arms. “I was so afraid you’d turn me away. That I’d messed it up for good.”
She shook her head. “I tried to think like you. That maybe no ties, no commitments was the way to go to avoid being hurt. But it didn’t work. I couldn’t seem to find any joy anymore.”
His dark eyes deepened and he took a shaky breath. “It’s no guarantee against being hurt. I should know.” And his bottom lip wobbled a little bit.
“How do you know?”
He pulled out a kitchen chair and nudged her into it, and then pulled out another and sat knee to knee with her. He took her fingers in his, an anchor in a swirl of emotional chaos. “I know, Harper, because nothing has been the same since I left here. The business is flourishing and I find I don’t have the same excitement or passion anymore. It’s like there’s a puzzle piece missing, and that piece is you. That day at the wedding, I did freak out. I could see this settled and boring life ahead of me if I gave in to my feelings for you. I knew you wanted to put down roots and I couldn’t breathe. I was afraid, so I ran, telling both of us it was for the best.”
“So you said,” she replied.
“Here’s the thing. When I was about eight, I overheard my mom and dad having a fight. Dad was always the stable one, you know? Provider for the family. We grew up in the same house our entire lives. And I thought it was great, until I heard that fight. Until I realized how much my father had given up over the years. Opportunities, promotions that would have involved moving...but Mom never wanted to. She didn’t want to make us move schools. Didn’t want to leave our neighbourhood. And my dad had another opportunity come up and she didn’t want to go and he told her he felt stuck in his life. That she and the kids had held him back from reaching his potential.”
“Oh, Drew. That must have made you feel horrible.”
“I was eight. I felt at least part of my dad’s unhappiness was my fault. And I knew, too, that I didn’t want to ever be like that. Caught in a rut and unable to get out, resentful of how my life had turned out. I wanted to set my own terms and travel and not be tied down with a wife and kids who I thought would drain me of my energy and passion.”
Harper reached out and took his hand. “We really are two sides of the same coin. My mom and dad loved to move around. It was all about the next adventure. But me... I wanted to stay in one place. Make friends for longer than a year or two at a time. Sleep in the same bedroom and live somewhere long enough that I might actually get tired of the paint and want to redecorate it.”
His fingers played with hers as her throat tightened painfully. “The truth is...” She met his gaze evenly, and her lip trembled again. “I think I had all these plans to get back to my regular life after Belle was born, and now I am, and I’m not happy anymore. I’m so scared, Drew. If this is all there is, what’s to become of me? I wanted roots. My own house. A business. Friends. It was enough. But it’s not anymore.”
“And you feel empty.”
“Yes!” She was so relieved he seemed to understand.
“Me, too,” he said. “I called my dad to ask him about that fight. He remembered it, you know. The company had wanted him to transfer up north. It would have meant a big raise. I asked him if he still resented it and if it had always affected their marriage. And you know what he said?”
She shook her head.
“They made that decision together.” He let out a breath and shook his head, as if disbelieving. “Oh, there were still times of stress. Dad wasn’t always happy at work and it bled over into his home life. But he told me he had no regrets. Now all this time I let that colour who I was and what I wanted. I wasted so much time on something that wasn’t even real. I love my life, I do. But since July... I want something more. I need it. Because nothing’s been the same for me either, Harper, and I think that’s because I fell in love with you, too.” He lifted his hand and placed it on the side of her face. “I don’t know how we’re going to make it work—or if you even want to. But I really, really want to try.”
Something that had been missing for months suddenly flickered to life, right in the center of her chest. It was hope...hope at happiness, hope at love, hope at a future she’d given up on.
She was so overwhelmed. But she clasped his hands and bit down on her lip before saying, “I’d like that. A lot.”
“Good.” He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. “It’s gonna be okay now, all right? We’re going to figure it out. Together.”
She nodded, and then surprised them both by asking, “Can we get something to eat? For the first time in almost a month, I’m actually starving.”
His grin lit up the room. “Yes. Whatever you want. We can hit the town and buy lobster and champagne. We can make a grilled cheese sandwich. As long as I’m with you, I don’t care what we eat.”
“Pizza. I’d kill for one.”
Before she could get up and reach for the take-out menus, though, he touched her knee. “I have one more question to ask, Harper. Will you go to the store opening with me on Thursday?”
A little fizz of excitement ran through her veins. “I’d love to. I can’t wait to see what you’ve done with the place.”
“That sounds perfect,” he answered, and he leaned forward and finally kissed her. Tears burned in her eyes at the sweetness of it, a depth of emotion that was unexpected. It was a hello. It was a confession. And it was a promise to face things together.
* * *
Drew didn’t think he’d ever been prouder of a store opening. The shelves and racks were stocked, the new manager was circulating and staff was assisting the invited guests and VIPs who’d come in since the doors opened. A bar was set up in a corner and a caterer had hot finger foods that filled the air with rich, savory scents. It looked magnificent, all polished logs and shiny new fixtures and beautiful displays. Harper was beside him in a long skirt and tall brown boots, her hair done in long curls for the occasion, and a bracelet Drew had given her as a gift at her wrist. Dan and Adele were behind them, with little Isabelle in her mother’s arms. His family and the woman he loved...his heart was full. Almost.
There was something that he wanted Harper to see, and he’d had his assistant pull a few strings to make it all come together.
He took Harper by the hand and led her to the huge stone fireplace. Display racks and shelving were designed around it, holding an assortment of upscale backpacking supplies. And above the mantel...