Almost a Family

He held the door open wordlessly. Molly lifted the sleeping girl out of her seat and carried her gently into the house, sliding past Jason without meeting his gaze. Blearily, Sara woke as Molly tried to slide off her boots and winter jacket with as little fuss as possible. “Shh,” she whispered. “We’re home. Let’s get you up to bed.”

She looked at Jason as she hefted Sara into her arms again. “I’m putting her to bed. Thanks for the lift. You don’t have to stay.” Her voice coolly dismissed him.

He shut the door behind him, and she heard his truck start as she got to the top of the stairs. Then it finally dawned on her that he hadn’t spoken one single word since leaving the hospital.

*

Jason slipped off his white coat and hung it on the hook on the back of his office door. All day at the clinic he’d seen clients and their pets, ordered lab tests, smiled and joked with his staff. He’d eaten a quick ham sandwich in the kitchenette in the basement, then had taken an hour to run the deposit to the bank and make a drop-off at the lab. An ordinary day.

Every minute of that ten-hour day, he replayed last night’s kiss.

What had he been thinking, anyway? Molly wasn’t the same Molly he’d fallen in love with as a teenager. He’d known that the minute he’d opened the door to her.

She was a hotshot lawyer now, making scads of money with a high profile oil and gas company. She’d waltzed back home in expensive clothes and an exclusive attitude. She didn’t realize she’d become snobby, he was sure of it. But the years away had changed her. She acted like being back east was something to be tolerated. Like it was a little behind in terms of progress and sophistication. When she’d left for bigger and better things, she’d made it clear that Fredericton, that Jason, wasn’t good enough for her. She hadn’t wanted the life that he’d planned for them.

Yet for a moment, when he’d reached around her to unlock her door last night, he had been transported back to nearly a decade before. The smell of her hair, the feel of her body as she’d leaned back against him, just a little. Something they’d done a hundred times before. He’d nuzzled her hair and, carried away with the moment, had pressed a small kiss to her scalp, her ear. He hadn’t expected her to turn and kiss him. He hadn’t expected to kiss her back.

He hadn’t expected it to feel like she’d never left.

The staff had all gone home, and it was only Jason and the kenneled animals left in the quiet building. He gave them one last check, then turned off the reception lights and set the alarm. He took out his key and, in the frosty air, turned it to latch the deadbolt. His breath formed clouds and he remembered the feel of her cold lips against his. That feeling, her taste… They were as familiar as if they’d been happening every day for the past six years. Kissing Molly had raised his pulse to a nervous hammering, had opened his heart until something similar to hope had slammed in.

He hadn’t thought there was any room for hope in there anymore.

He knew there wasn’t hope in there for Molly.

He shook his head and started up his truck, letting it warm up before putting it into gear. Kissing Molly had been a terrible mistake. Because hope was the last thing she could give him. And it was the last thing he wanted. She would only hurt him again. He knew that as surely as he knew he’d never truly gotten over her.

He entered the dark house, feeling a little lonely. He sighed, cursing Molly’s return. For a few short days, it’d been nice to have Sara there with him, her bubbly chatter filling up the empty space and giving him a purpose.

All those years ago, he’d dreamed of coming home to Molly at night, to a warm, cozy house and their children. It had broken his heart to suddenly realize she didn’t want those things, not the way he did. As time had gone on, he’d nearly forgotten how much he longed for a family of his own until the last few years, living next to Kim and Sara. Sara was a dream child—bright, precocious, darling. As he turned on the light, Bubbles trotted over. The little ball of white fluff was insanely happy to see him. He crouched and ruffled the dog’s curly fur.

“Hey, you.” He chuckled as the dog pushed her head against his hand. “You hungry?” He stood, filled the dog’s dish from the bag in the cupboard and got her fresh water. It was nice having her here. The cats… They didn’t seem to care much one way or the other when he got home. They only came running when he opened their food. But Bubbles greeted him every night. It was a poor substitute for a family, but he’d take whatever he could.

Heading to the fridge, he noticed the light flashing on his phone and stopped to push the button for his messages.

“Hi, Uncle Jason. It’s Sara. Can I come see Bubbles tonight? Okay. Bye.”

He smiled at the brief, uncomplicated message. Lonely didn’t begin to describe how he’d felt recently. Sara was like a little ray of sunshine on a cloudy day.

But Molly would have to bring her over.

He took his hand off the phone. He had to get over Molly once and for all. Seeing her was torture, but he wasn’t going to let that keep him from seeing his favorite girl.

Setting his lips, he picked up the phone and dialed.

*

He’d just finished eating a piece of sloppy, microwaved lasagna when the doorbell rang. Pushing his plate to the side, he rose to answer it, and his heart skipped a beat as he opened the door to see Molly with Sara in her arms. Molly’s hair was pulled back in a simple, girlish ponytail, the ends trailing on the collar of her coat. Her cheeks were pink from the cold above the striped scarf wrapped around her neck. Sara’s face was close to hers, close enough for Jason to see the resemblance—the blonde hair, same shaped eyes and the bow of their lips. By appearances, Sara could have been theirs, his and Molly’s. Jason pasted a smile on his face to hide the quick stab of regret. “Hey, sweet thing. Let’s go see if Bubbles is in the backyard.”

He took Sara from Molly’s arms and said quietly, “Come on in, make yourself at home.”

He left her there, taking off her coat, while he carried Sara to the back door. Sara waited while he opened it and whistled, and a white, cold, snowy ball of fluff barreled into the house.

“Bubbles!” Sara sat happily on the floor while her puppy joyously licked her face.

“Why don’t you take her out on the porch and play with her toys?” Jason suggested as Molly entered the kitchen.

“Can I, Aunt Molly?”