Almost a Family

A pause.

“Do you want some help?”

Molly’s hands paused holding a shirt. They were sisters, but despite everything, they’d never been confidantes. When would that have happened? Molly hadn’t even been around for the past several years. She couldn’t open up to her sister now. Especially not with how she felt about Jason or, more importantly, how she felt about Kim and Jason. How she felt knowing something was between them.

She wandered closer to the door, placed a hand on it. “Would you mind if I said I need some time alone?”

Kim’s voice was close, just on the other side of the wood. “Not at all.” Another pause. “But…Molly, if you need anything, come get me.”

Molly’s eyes stung again. Dammit. Kim deserved happiness. She gave and gave of herself, rarely getting anything in return. Now that Molly was getting out of the way, now that she and Jason had finally dealt with their own breakup, maybe something would happen so they both would be happy.

And that should make her happy. But it didn’t, and she felt small and petty knowing she couldn’t put their future happiness ahead of her own.

Kim moved on down the hall and Molly absently laid the shirt in the case and sat on the edge of the bed, dazed.

How could she muster up happiness, while her body still hummed from making love to him earlier?

She still loved him. But he wasn’t going to sacrifice anything for her, and maybe she was wrong for asking him to. He wanted home and family and the life he had here. If ever two people had the same goals and aspirations in life, it was Jason and Kim. Molly would go back to Calgary and get out of the way. She was leaving the firm, of that she was sure. But returning here no longer seemed an option. Not unless she was into self-torture, and she wasn’t. The past few weeks had taught her that. They had assured her that sometimes love, sometimes passion weren’t enough. Kim had learned that long ago—with Sara’s father.

It all made sense…except to Molly’s heart. And what her heart knew was that she’d never love another man as she loved him. As she packed the last of her things and zipped up the bag, tears ran down her cheeks, hot and devastating. Still clothed and completely worn out, she crawled under the comforter and cried herself to sleep.

The following morning was somber and tinged with sadness. Molly had tried to camouflage her swollen eyes and rough cheeks with makeup, but it hadn’t worked very well. Sara picked at her cereal, her usual bubbly chatter absent. Kim made a second pot of coffee and Molly checked her watch. Eight forty-five. She had a little over an hour to make sure she had everything and say goodbye. Once things got settled, once she knew exactly what she was doing, she’d tell Kim her plans. But she didn’t want to say anything now, not when so much was undecided.

Time was too short. And it was too long. In some ways, she’d be much happier making it quick and painless and leaving right now.

“Maybe Sara and I can make a trip out this summer,” Kim offered. Her post-accident paleness was gone but unmistakable misery lined her face.

“I’d like that,” Molly replied, even though she doubted she’d still be in Calgary by summer. “We could go to the zoo and the dinosaur museum.”

Fun, hah. It sounded lackluster and they both knew it.

“You talked to Jason?”

Molly took a few moments to add sugar and cream to her coffee. She couldn’t exactly hide her face, so smiled ruefully and pointed to her eyes. “Obviously.”

It wasn’t in her to be mad at Kim for not telling her about kissing Jason. Molly had realized last night that with everything that had been dealt with over the past few weeks, she wasn’t even sure how that conversation could have taken place. The fact of the matter was that six years ago she’d left them both, and Kim was single and next door. It wasn’t fair of Molly to judge. In fact, what hurt the most was knowing that Kim would be better for him than she would. That Kim would make him happy in a way that Molly never had. All it would take was her getting out of the way so they could get on with it.

“Uncle Jason loves you,” Sara piped up, swirling her spoon in the milk in the bottom of her bowl.

“Sara!”

The girl looked up at her mother, eyes wide and innocent. “Well, he does. ’Cause he was kissing her the way you said people kiss when they love each other.”

Kim’s cheeks flamed brilliant red, as did Molly’s. She didn’t intend for Kim to find out exactly what had happened at Jason’s last night, and that carried its own level of guilt.

“Honey, why don’t you make sure your hair and teeth are brushed? I’ll be up in a minute.”

Sara slid off her chair and headed for the stairs, but turned at the last minute. “I wish you could stay, Aunt Molly. You’re fun.”

Molly couldn’t help but choke out a laugh. Had it only been a few short weeks ago when she’d been at her wits end trying to care for Sara? Her feelings for her niece now went far beyond any familial obligation. Sara would be the bright spot when she returned, either for a visit or if Molly decided to come back east to stay.

When she was gone, Kim said quietly, “What kiss?”

Molly sighed. “The day we went sledding. Sara and I pulled a

trick on him, and one thing led to another… I’m sorry Sara saw it, though. We should have been more discreet…”

“You guys are idiots.”