Almost a Family

They loved him, he knew. And they’d stayed together through their grief, yet things had never been the same after Jonathan died, and more than anything Jason had wanted to recapture that familial happiness that had existed before the tragedy.

He knew that, acknowledged it. Stripping off his latex gloves, he sighed. But what he hadn’t understood, not really, was that he had been so single-mindedly focused on having the perfect family that he’d tried to command every single detail. He’d organized their life according to his vision, down to the most trivial thing, and spanning several years. Where they would live. Where they would work. When they’d have babies, for Pete’s sake! He had been so afraid of losing his chance at happiness and family that he’d taken control. He’d wanted that family only with the girl, then woman, he’d fallen in love with. And he’d been afraid of losing her, so he’d tried to order everything and make her fit the mold.

He’d even seduced her last night, thinking that if he could get her to admit that she wanted him, if he could make love to her and remind her of all they’d had, she’d come around.

She had been different. More. Her body more lush, curved. It hadn’t been just sex and she hadn’t been a girl in love with a boy. She’d been all woman. No one since had fired his blood the way she had. No woman ever filled him with super-human strength with a simple touch or smile. But she did. And he’d blown it when he’d mentioned Kim.

Backtracking hadn’t been enough. She’d set the trap and he’d walked right into it. And opened his big fat mouth.

But you couldn’t control life and you sure as hell couldn’t control other people. Especially someone as strong and determined as Molly. And it had been his fear of losing that had caused him to lose her anyway.

“Boss? You okay?”

Jason turned at the sound of one of the office assistants.

“Sure. Why?”

“Because I told you that we’re low on amoxicillin and you said to take a message.”

He stared. “Sorry, Bess. I’m a little preoccupied. We should have more stock with the next drug order.”

“Okay.” She smiled a little quizzically at him. “I’ll just get back to work.”

Jason went downstairs, locked himself in the bathroom and leaned over the sink. He ran some cold water and splashed his face, looking in the mirror at his drawn eyes and grim lips. Who was he kidding? He was miserable. He’d blown it for the second time. All the planning to show Molly what she had given up had done nothing but blow up in his face. Instead, he’d told her about kissing Kim. Talk about your awkward situations. But in the end, he knew she was leaving because he hadn’t been able to admit he had something to learn, too.

And that was going to change, starting right now.

When she’d asked him last night about what he envisioned, he’d sensed a trap but had gone ahead with what he’d allowed himself to fantasize about. His house, no longer empty but ringing with her laughter. Sleeping beside her at night, hearing her even breathing, the warmth of her body seeping into his. He’d pictured her rounded with pregnancy and glowing, beautiful. Had seen her years in the future, a handful of kids around her as she packed school lunches and checked homework, soothed tears and celebrated successes.

That’s what he’d wanted. But again, he hadn’t asked what she wanted. He’d let her go, never attempted to connect with her again because he had always been sure she’d been the one in the wrong. Finally, he was beginning to see that her dreams were every bit as important as his. And he hadn’t even asked her what hers were! He’d accused her of being self-absorbed when he’d been the one guilty of that transgression.

What did he have, really? Besides an empty house and a sixty-hour work week? He loved his work, yes, but his personal life? Shambles.

If the past three weeks had accomplished nothing else, they had made him realize one thing. He hadn’t been living, not really. He’d been going through the motions, salving his need for family with the girl next door and her daughter, avoiding getting out there and experiencing life. The few times he’d attempted relationships, they’d fallen flat, never lasting very long. In the last three weeks, whether he and Molly had been fighting, not speaking or kissing, the end result had been the same. Being with Molly again had made him feel more alive than he’d felt in years.

He’d learned there was more than one way to be happy.

And right now she was getting on an airplane and flying away from him. Again. And for good.

He opened the bathroom door and went back upstairs, looking around with new eyes. Yes, he’d built a lucrative business, but he could do that anywhere. He couldn’t imagine living in a world where he didn’t do what he loved, but he couldn’t imagine doing what he loved without Molly by his side either. Without her, everything seemed pointless, and he knew now that if he let her get away a second time he would never forgive himself.

His employees bustled around, doing their jobs, but now it didn’t seem as meaningful to him. Not without her.

He looked at the clock on the wall. She was probably already gone, he realized. Still, he knew that if he didn’t at least try, he’d regret it every single day of his life. If he had to, he’d buy a ticket to Calgary and go after her himself.

He stripped off his lab coat, hung it on a hook and grabbed his jacket. “Tell Mark I had to go out, and I’m sorry. Reschedule if you can. I won’t be back today.”

“But Dr. Elliot…”

But he was already out the door and jogging toward the truck. It was a five-minute drive to the airport. Maybe he wasn’t too late. But he had to make a stop first.

As Jason skidded into the parking lot, he saw an airplane taking off, nose up, heading into the low cloud cover. He swung into the first empty space he saw and didn’t even bother with change for the meter. If she was gone, there was only one thing to do—go after her.

*

“Flight eight-seven-four-three to Toronto is now boarding. All passengers should now proceed through security to the gate.”

Molly looked at her watch. Well, at least they were going to board at the revised scheduled time. They should have been boarding a half hour ago, but she’d been left sitting in the lounge, drinking stale coffee while the crews de-iced the plane. Oh well…it would make her layover in Toronto shorter, she supposed. Finally, now, it seemed she could get on board and get back to disassembling what was left of her life.