Looking for You (Oh Captain, My Captain 1)

“We met at a seminar. Sweet Ellie here kept me awake the whole time. Yep, that’s our Ellie. Caring, sweet, kindhearted, you know just an honest person. It’s so sad that world has so many dishonest people in it. Oh well, what are you going to do? I mean, tell the truth, it would just be easier.” Lacey casually looks my way.

I drop my head, running my hand over my face. I don’t think I can do this. I can’t sit here for the rest of dinner with Lacey taunting me. I told her that I would tell Ellie and I’m going to. Why can’t that be enough for now? She doesn’t have to put me through this.

“Um, am I missing something?” Ellie asks, obviously confused.

“Oh, Ellie. I’m sorry. I’m being rude, and I don’t mean to be. I have had a really long and complicated day. I apologize, Hudson. I don’t mean it. Let’s just enjoy this great food and talk about something interesting.”

Ellie seems to accept this, but now I’m stressed out and ready to go home. The weight of my omission is too heavy to bear. I listen as they talk, not really absorbing anything they’re saying. Ellie’s fingers brush my arm to snap me out of my thoughts. She’s looking at me expectantly.

“What?” I ask.

“Is everything okay?” She repeats softly with concern.

“I’m sorry. I’m not feeling all that great. I think I’m going to go home.” I scoot my chair back and stand, placing a hand on her shoulder. “I’ll see you in a few days, okay?”

Ellie nods. “Just leave your plate. I’ll get it. I hope you feel better, Hudson.”

“Thank you.” I kiss her cheek, turn to Lacey and tell her it was nice meeting her, and then I get the hell away from them as fast as possible.

The more I think about it, the sicker I feel. All I can think about is the look on Ellie’s face when I tell her that I’m not an architect like she thinks I am. The longer I think about it, the worse it gets. Finally, I can’t take it anymore, pull off on the side of the road and call my mother.

“Hudsy,” she answers. “How are you?”

“Terrible, Mom.” For like the fifth time, I run my hand over my face as if I’ll wipe away all of my stress.

“Oh, no. You told her?”

“Ha, not yet. I’m going to tell her in a couple of days. I know I have to, but it’s going to destroy her and kill me in the process. The plan is to do like you said and show her what I love about it. But won’t that seem like I’m…hell, I don’t know,” I finish frustrated that I can’t seem to explain myself clearly.

“Take a deep breath, Hudson.” She waits until I do so. “Remember what I told you, if it’s meant to be, it will be. It might take a while, but it’ll happen. Just be honest and sincere with her. Everything else will fall into its rightful place.”

“I sure hope so.”

Chapter Sixteen

Ellie

I watch Hudson walk away from me, and I’ve never seen him look so upset before. I turn to Lacey and stare at her.

“What?” She scrunches her eyebrows at me.

“What the heck happened? I thought this was going to be a good night. What did you say to him?”

“You assume that it’s my fault that Prince Charming didn’t feel well and left?” She picks up her plate and heads into the house. I pick up our plates and follow her.

“Lacey, what is going on? Seriously. You two were talking, alone, for a while out front. What is it?” When I walked out to them, they looked like they were arguing. Lacey puts her plate on the counter with her back to me. “Lacey, please?” I plead quietly.

She finally turns to me. “Okay, I may have told him that if he hurts you, I’ll physically hurt him.”

“Lacey!” I yell at her. “Why would you do that?”

She crosses her arms and steps closer to me. “You’re my best friend. I love you, and I’m looking out for you. I always will.”

“I appreciate that, I do. However, I trust Hudson. He’s not going to hurt me. Plus, I think it’s getting serious.” I walk around her and put my plates on the counter.

“Wait, what do you mean? Has something happened?”

I turn to her and smile. “Well, I didn’t have sex, but something did happen.”