“Well, if my hockey career fails, I can become a professional storyteller.” He tosses the book on the nightstand.
I pick up Sadie and tuck her in bed, telling her how much I love her. When Ashton shuts off the light, the room is illuminated with a yellow glow from the nightlight.
He touches my arm as we continue down the hall. “You want to have a nightcap?”
I shake my head. “Not tonight.” I can see the hurt in his eyes, but I need time alone.
Chapter Sixteen
Ashton
I can’t stop thinking about earlier, and I really want to see Lexie. It seems absurd that I’m not seeing her right now since I’m right across the hall. Tossing the blankets aside, I very quietly get up and open the bedroom door. Brooke stops mid-tiptoe when she sees me.
“What do you think you’re doing, young lady?” I whisper in my best authoritative tone.
“Shut up. What do you think I’m doing?”
“Sneaking around like a horny teenager.”
“Okay, maybe. But what are you doing out?”
“Bathroom? Kind of hungry too. Totally innocent activities.”
“Liar. Are you going to talk to Lexie? I can see there is some tension.”
“Don’t you have somewhere to sneak off to? If we keep talking here, we’ll be found.”
“Well, just be easy with her, and be a gentleman.”
“Always am. You be a lady.”
Brooke rolls her eyes and tiptoes past me. I slowly open Lexie’s door, cringing when it creaks. “Lex? You awake?” I whisper.
There’s a moment of silence before I hear, “Yes, you can come in.”
I close the door behind me as Lexie moves to the other side of the bed so I can lie down next to her. “Did I wake you, or couldn’t you sleep either?” My hand finds hers, needing to touch her even in the smallest of ways.
“I was lying here thinking. What about you?”
“Same. Doing okay still? You’re not going to push me away, are you?” That’s the last thing I want, but I know it must be hard for her. My worst fear was what happened today; Sadie calling me Daddy, and seeing Lexie’s reaction. I want her to be happy, and I want her to do whatever she feels is right for Sadie.
“No. Tiff tells me I overthink a lot of stuff. I just….I’m scared.”
I squeeze her hand. “You don’t have to be. I’m not going to hurt you or Sadie, and I’m not taking Tony’s place either.” That’s not what I want, but I do want to be there for Sadie, too, if Lexie wants me to be. Tony is her dad, and I really like her mom. There’s room for us both, as long as Lex is okay with that.
“I know you’re not, but that’s the first time she’s ever called someone ‘Dad’. I didn’t even know what to do. I talked to her, but I don’t know.” She moves to lie on her side to look at me, so I do too. “Are we moving too fast? I mean, I know the kids don’t know, but what do you think?”
“Has she ever had someone else around where that might have slipped out? You have to think about that too, Lex. We’re not moving too fast, but if you’d rather Brooke handle my side of the playdates so I’m not around her as much until things are more serious, we could do that.” With a deep breath, I finish softly, “I don’t know what you want.”
Lexie sighs. “Ashton, in the past seven years, I’ve been on two dates. Tony and I were together for a long time. I know I shouldn’t put this on you because you’re so young, but I don’t how to act with a guy anymore. I mean, the other night I almost ripped your clothes off, and I haven’t had these feelings in a long, long time.” This time, she takes a deep breath. “Sadie really likes you, and I don’t mind you coming to playdates because that gives you time with Reed too.”
“I’m not young, Lexie.” What is up with her and all this age nonsense? “Hell, I’ve been a parent one whole year longer than you, and look at Brooke and Nate. I’m only three years younger, so stop with that.” I reach out and squeeze her hip. “And believe me, I want you naked all the time, but I’m not rushing anything. I don’t want to. I haven’t really dated in a while either, you know.” Maybe that will help her realize she’s not the only one going through similar things. “All that really matters right this second is that I like you, you like me, and our kids get along. Everything else can be figured out along the way.”
“Well, you do make good points. Our kids really love each other, and if we take things slower, maybe I won’t overthink so much. Then again, some things might have to have to be real slow.”
“Slow sounds perfect. And just remember that I don’t give up easily.” I grin.
“Please, no more flowers. Although,” she wiggles closer to me, “I did enjoy the spa day.”