TKO: Total Knock Out (TKO 1)

“Asshole,” Whitney snaps as she walks past me. I knew better than to call her last night and try to hold a conversation with her. Should have known she wouldn’t let me forget this.

Lance’s trying to act cool but he’s as worried as I am. I avoid bringing her up until he does. “I’m so sorry, man. She was there one minute dancing, and then she disappeared. I combed that place looking for her.”

“It’s not your fault.” It is though. If he had kept his dick in his pants last night, my girlfriend wouldn’t be missing. I need to tell her how I feel, how sorry I am for being an ass last night. I want her to know she’s safe with me. There’s an ache in my chest that only she can heal, but I’m terrified I’ve already lost her.

The door opens as Lance begins to throw a punch my way. His arm stops midway and he begins to stutter. He makes no sense whatsoever, and I’m at a loss for words once I look over and see Raegan walk inside. Our gazes lock and as badly as I want to tear mine away, I can’t.

She heads for Howard. Two minutes later she’s hitting the punching bag like nothing happened in the last few hours. The urge to approach her is overwhelming but the last thing I want to do is cause a scene in front of everyone. My head isn’t where it needs to be; I pull myself over to the weight bench to have a moment alone. I feel like such a wimp as tears begin to pool in my eyes while I lift the bar above my chest.

Have I pushed her away? I’ve barely had any time with her, but it was the best time of my life. Silent tears slide down my cheeks and I can’t stop them. I wipe my eyes, telling myself it’s time to leave; I can’t let anyone see me like this. Without a word, I walk straight for the door and once I’m outside it’s easier to breathe.

A hand touches my arm. Raegan’s standing in front of me, but I am not sure I can talk to her. I move my arm away and get into the cab of my truck, shutting the door behind me. Two weeks ago, everything was perfect and now it all seems to be going to shit. Ignoring her will solve nothing, I know that much. Being stubborn won’t help either. I open the door to find her standing there crying.

My heart just broke a little more; my God I feel like an ass.

“Raegan, come here.” I jump out the truck and pull her into my arms while she cries onto my chest. I don’t care how angry I was earlier; she’s okay, and she’s here with me now. My shirt is soaked in a matter of seconds but I don’t mind. I pick her up, wrapping her legs around my waist, and lean against the truck. I stare into her tear soaked eyes, and lightly brush my lips across hers. She’s hesitant at first but kisses me back, and each kiss is more eager than the last.

“I’m so sorry, Garrett. I didn’t mean to.”

“Shhh. Baby, it’s okay. I don’t care. All I care about is you’re okay. I was so scared something happened to you and I’d never be able to tell you how sorry I was for yelling at you. I don’t know what the hell came over me. I was nothing but jealous, and I didn’t need to be. I wanted to tell you just how much you mean to me. From the moment I saw you, I loved you. You know that, but I never want to miss an opportunity to tell you that. Please don’t scare me like this again.”

She stares into my eyes, and I brush her tears away with my thumb; she doesn’t need to cry anymore. Everything is going to be okay, I know it.

“I’m supposed to meet my Dad today, I’m such a mess.” She sniffles, attempting to wipe her nose.

“No, you aren’t. Let’s go get you changed, and we’ll go meet him, okay?” The ride to the apartment is quiet, but she never moves her hand from mine.

Nervous as hell, she keeps fidgeting with her hands. She had called Nancy to find out we were meeting them at a small café a few blocks over. As we pull up, Raegan immediately tenses, but when I squeeze her hand, she leans over and kisses my cheek.

“Thank you Garrett. I couldn’t do this without you.”

“I love you, Raegan, I’d do anything for you.”

Nancy and her Dad are already sitting at a table. Her dad looks tired, his gaze softened; I see a part of Raegan in his brown eyes. Much different from the last time I saw him when she went crazy on her truck. Raegan’s trying to smile but is failing pretty miserably.

“Thank you for coming, Rae,” her father says. “I know things have been bad but I’m trying to make it better.” He didn’t say anything else for a while.

Raegan nurses a coke, trembling almost the whole time. When the waitress brings her turkey sandwich, she picks off all the crust and begins dissecting it like some weird science experiment. I squeeze her thigh under the table but she doesn’t relax like I hoped she would; she wiggles until I remove my hand. I don’t know what’s going on, I just want to be there for her. Nancy tells her about the upcoming meeting they’re supposed to attend. Raegan nods and answers when she’s supposed to, but for a while she doesn’t seem like she’s really there.

“Dad,” Raegan blurts out from nowhere, catching us all off guard. “I love you but I…I don’t know if I’m ready for this.” She’s beginning to stand and I try to catch her arm but she jerks it away as tears slide down her face. “Stop, Garrett, please just stop.”

Her body tenses; I watch as she takes several breaths so she can stand. She stares at me for a brief moment before looking away.

“We need to talk, Garrett.”

My best attempt to smile falters when she moves a few feet away from the table to face me better. For the first time in my life, I’m frightened. When I step into the ring, I’ve never been as scared as I am right now. I feel vulnerable like every single fear I have is surfacing and rearing its ugly face.

“Okay,” I mumble, hoping for the best but ultimately expecting the worst. Her Dad and Nancy are still sitting there at the table trying to eat, but we all know they are waiting to see what Raegan will say or do.

“You hurt me. You invaded my privacy. If I had wanted to answer Nancy’s call, I would. I don’t need you doing that for me. You scared me when you raised your voice at me. You didn’t listen to me when I told you the conversation was

nothing more than what it was. You let your jealousy get the best of you.” She pauses, biting her lip. “I called James from the bar last night, and I stayed over there because I was drunk but nothing happened. He’s in love with her, his girlfriend, I’m sure you don’t believe me about that either, but I’ve done a lot of thinking this morning and—”

My heart is breaking because I know what’s coming next. She’s breaking up with me. I wasn’t good enough for her. She takes a deep breath while running her fingers through her hair.

“I think we rushed into this. I…I need space, Garrett. I’m sorry.”

That beautiful mouth I loved to kiss just spoke the worst words I’ve ever heard. She continued to talk but I didn’t hear anything else she said. I interrupt her as calmly as I can.