“Ruston, what are you doing here?”
“I had to see you, Tamilyn. I should have said everything to you in person, not in that text message. I need you to know what you really mean to me.” His lips come crashing down on mine and my whole world turns foggy. His kiss melts against my lips and I’m putty in his hands. I break the kiss, not really wanting to, but we’re just standing in the doorway. I step back, letting him inside before I lock the door behind us.
“You’ve been drinking, haven’t you?” I raise my eyebrow.
“Since Austin left to take you out, yes.”
“Do you know how long I’ve waited to hear you say something like you did tonight, Ruston? And you wait until your cousin comes around, then you get jealous and decide you want to come out with this? That’s not fair to me.” I cross my arms over my chest and lean against my kitchen counter. I move from the counter and grab the half bottle of wine out of my refrigerator. The cork pops out with ease and I tilt the bottle back. Once I’ve got a taste of my poison, I set it on the counter and cross my arms once more.
“Nothing is fair, Tammy Lou. Not a fucking thing is fair. I should have taken you to dinner tonight. It should have been me. I love you, and when you tell me you love me, do you mean it like I do? Yeah, I’m jealous. I’m fucking jealous down to my core but I didn’t want you to know that. You’re a grown woman and you can do what you want. I just needed you to hear how I really feel about you.”
“We’re both so screwed up, you know that? We’ve both apparently felt this way for a while and we never had the guts to say anything. Does this ruin things? Tell me that, because you’re all I have and I won’t lose you.”
“You won’t lose me, Tam, because I will never let you go.”
“There’s one problem. I like Austin. I had a good time tonight.”
“Don’t fucking kill me, Tamilyn, please? Let me show you I can be the guy for you. You know me, you don’t know him.”
“I’ve liked you for so long. I’m just scared, okay? I can admit that.”
He steps closer, cornering me against the counter. The beer on his breath invades my space and leaves me thirsty for a taste. He slides the wine bottle out of the way and places a hand on each side of me. “You know you never have to be scared around me,” he whispers as he kisses me again. My arms wrap around his neck as the kiss deepens. My heart is pounding, and he’s so close, I swear I can feel his heartbeat too. His erection digs into my thigh and a moan escapes my mouth. We’ve never ever messed around like this. Hell, we’ve never even kissed before last night and suddenly I want every part of him.
I really hope he doesn’t think I’m a virgin, because I’m not. He doesn’t know that Jess and I went to a party a few years back, and I let some macho football player deflower me. Not my best moment in life and I regret who I had sex with that night. With a gorgeous body like his, I’m sure he’s hiding his own secrets, but I don’t care.
He fumbles with my shirt and lifts it up. I raise my arms, giving him access to remove it. My pink lace bra is all that’s covering the top of my body. It’s almost like wearing a bathing suit top in front of him so I’m not embarrassed at all, but with the flick of his wrist, he unfastens the bra and it falls to the floor. My breasts are bare to him and I can feel them rising and falling with every breath I take.
“So fucking beautiful,” he murmurs as he lowers his mouth to one of my nipples. I moan as he pulls it into his mouth. My panties don’t stand a fucking chance; they’re already wet and my body is laced with desire.
My hand moves down to his jeans and I grab hold of a belt loop and pull him closer. He reaches down into my jeans and teases my clit through my panties. Oh dear God, I’m coming undone and he hasn’t done anything. We’
ve crossed a major line and even if we were to stop now, it’d be way too late.
He withdraws and gazes at me. “I’ve wanted you for so long, Tam.”
“Me too,” I admit, out of breath. He picks me up and I shriek as he carries me toward my bedroom. He peppers me with kisses as he lays me on the bed and trails a line of kisses from my mouth to my navel. When he removes my jeans, I hold my breath. I can’t say that my decision making is all screwed up because of drinking. Even though I’m drunk, things have never been clearer. This is what I’ve been wanting—for Ruston to tell me how he feels, and tonight I’m getting double. He’s told me and now he’s going to show me.
He stops once my jeans are off but leaves my pink panties on. “Tam, I’m sorry. I’m rushing this. I didn’t think this through. I’m so sorry.”
“Stop, Ruston, don’t be sorry. I want this as much as you do.”
His phone goes off in his pocket and he pulls it out to see who it is. “Fuck,” he mutters.
“It’s Austin, isn’t it?” I hate to bring up his name right now because it’s making me feel like the shitty person I am.
“Yeah. He’s wondering where I am.”
“What are you going to tell him?” I’m curious to know just what he plans to say.
“The truth. That I’m with a beautiful woman and I may not be coming home.” He kisses my lips and then types his answer.
Guilt washes over me and I wonder how I can feel guilty when I’ve just met Austin and we’ve only gone to dinner once. Ruston tosses the phone onto the floor and kicks his jeans off. His underwear slides off along with them and I stare in amazement at the size of his cock. You think you know your best friend, and then you see what you’d been missing. All I can manage to do is lick my lips and grasp my bed sheets between my fingers.
“Ruston, promise me this changes nothing.”
“Tam, I swear this changes nothing for me at all.”
He slides his hand inside my panties this time and the moisture wraps around his fingers. Closing my eyes, I give myself over to him. Fuck, I’m unraveling.