Sitting in my truck, I stare at my house. This place is my solitude. I know I’ll have to eventually leave it and get a place for Hilary and myself if we’re going to raise this baby together. That means I’ll be fighting for real survival like my mom and dad did when they first started out. If they could make it twenty-five years, Hilary and I will be able to.
“Hey, Hil, you trust me, right?”
Her eyes glimmer with a hint of hope. “Yeah, I trust you. Why are you asking me this?”
“I just need to know that you believe me. I won’t go anywhere.”
“Of course I believe you, Lance.”
She leaves it at that, and silence falls between us.
“I’m kind of glad Raegan is pregnant at the same time,” I say, unable to handle the quiet. “This way, our…um, I mean, the babies can grow up together.”
“It’s okay to say our baby.” She grabs my hand. “He gave up every right. Not like I was going to give him rights anyway. In my eyes, you are the father.”
“You mean it’ll call me daddy?” I don’t think I’ve ever been happier.
“It?” She scrunches her nose.
“Well, we don’t know if the baby is a boy or girl yet, so that’s why I said it. What did you think I was talking about, the clown?”
She bursts into a fit of laughter, and snorts. “Seriously? That clown is creepy as hell!”
“Well, I was thinking we could decorate the nursery in full IT form. Clowns everywhere, sort of like a circus.”
“I’ve never seen a clown like that at a circus. What kind of circus did you go to?” she asks, with a hint of sarcasm.
“I love you. I know you’ve got to be tired. Let’s get you home.”
I finally start the truck and start the drive to her house.
“I’m going to miss you tonight.” She sighs, twirling her hair around her finger. I haven’t seen her do that in a long time.
“I’m going to miss you too. I like waking up next to you.”
“You liked way more than that. I know I did.” She smirks.
“Are you trying to talk dirty to me, Hilary?”
“N-no.” She stammers. She’s so cute when she’s been caught. I can’t help but laugh, and it frustrates her. Her arms are crossed over her chest and her ears are red.
“Don’t be embarrassed. I think it’s cute.”
“Maybe I don’t want to be cute. Cute is for little girls.”
“You are all grown up. I learned that last night.”
She slaps my arm, leaving a red mark. “Lance!”
“I’m just saying…” When we approach a red light, I unbuckle my seatbelt for just a moment. I lean over and kiss her cheek. “I love you, Hilary.”
“I love you too, you crazy man.”
The light turns green. I hurriedly put my seatbelt back on, and drive before everyone starts honking at me. I still can’t wipe this grin off my face. I think it may be permanent, which means I’ll walk around looking like the goddamn village idiot.
Hilary asks if I want to come inside for a few minutes when we arrive at her house. Her parents are more than hospitable. I stay for dinner, and watch as Hilary gets sleepy. She’s sitting on the couch, curled up on the corner with her head on my shoulder. Light snoring feels my ears, and I know she’s out for the night. I gently move, allowing her to stretch out on the couch. I reach for a blanket and cover her up, then place a kiss on her forehead before excusing myself. I help her mom finish cleaning up the kitchen, and her dad offers me a drink but I politely decline. I really need to be getting home too. It’s been a long few days.
Chapter 27