Raven (Orphans 4)

"Making fun of his stuttering," she said.

"That's all?" he followed, still eyeing me suspiciously.

"I don't know, Daddy. I wasn't paying attention. Suddenly, he smashed his hand into the window. Now, isn't that nuts?" she cried.

"How horrible," Aunt Clara said.

"Was he bleeding?" William asked.

"A lot. That's why they had to get the ambulance," Jennifer told him. William grimaced and looked to me.

"Mighty strange how all these terrible things are suddenly happening," Uncle Reuben declared. Afterward, Jennifer had the nerve to come to tell me she had done me a favor. "I protected you," she said, "so don't go blaming me for anything."

"How did you protect me?" I said, amazed at her boldness.

"I didn't tell Daddy why Clarence was being teased. He'd be real mad then, so you just better be nice to me, or. . ."

I shook my head. "I'd rather be nice to a rattlesnake," I told her. "You and Uncle Reuben deserve each other."

"I'll tell him you said that," she threatened. "You want another beating?"

"Leave me alone."

"I need some of my blouses ironed, and I don't have the time," she said. "I'll send them down with William, and you better not damage them, or else."

Later that evening, I heard Uncle Reuben tell Aunt Clara that

Clarence's stepfather had called. He said Clarence had to have twenty stitches and was being kept in the hospital for observation. He said he might even have to go to the psychiatric ward.

"I don't know how yet," he concluded, "but I'm sure Raven had something to do with this."

"Oh, Reuben, no. She wouldn't," Aunt Clara assured him.

"I'll find out. Trouble, that's all she is, trouble just waiting to happen. Damn my sister. She should have been sterilized."

What a horrible thing to say, I thought, but I did feel just terrible about Clarence. In a strange sort of way, I supposed I was responsible. If I hadn't let him talk me into showing me his basement room, the kids wouldn't have made up the chant. I bring disaster to everyone I touch, I thought. Uncle Reuben isn't so wrong.

Clarence's self-inflicted wound and the entire event on the bus were the big topic of discussion at school the next day. The kids who had tormented him didn't feel any remorse. If anything, they behaved as if they had helped bring out his mental illness. Now he would be where he belonged . . in a nut house. They were so smug I couldn't stand it. Clarence did not return, and in my way of thinking, he was the one who was better off.

Later that week, Clarence's stepfather somehow found out about the subject of the chanting and teasing, and he told Uncle Reuben. When he came home, armed with the knowledge, he wore a look of selfsatisfaction on his face. He proudly announced to Aunt Clara that I was indeed the cause of the trouble. For the time being, he seemed content being proven right. Aunt Clara retreated even more deeply into her shell, and Uncle Reuben's tyranny raged unchecked. He was what he wanted to be, king of his own home, supreme judge and jury, and we existed only for his pleasure and comfort.

My chores were increased. I wasn't permitted to go anywhere with anyone on the weekends for at least a month. No after-school activities, parties, not even a trip to the shopping mall. Aunt Clara put up little or no argument. A cloud fell over the house, even more dark and oppressive than the ones that had preceded it.

I waited and hoped for news of my mother. Nothing came. All Uncle Reuben would say was that she was on everyone's most wanted list.

"Why should she show her face around here?" he declared with a cold laugh. "She's got a brother assuming her responsibilities."

My mother had done many cruel and stupid things to me, but the worst, I thought, was leaving me with her brother.

I couldn't imagine how things could get worse. But they could.

And they did.

10 Home Alone

Being confined to the house while everyone else was out doing things on the weekend wasn't actually all that bad. I would have enjoyed it even more if William, who seemed to enjoy my company more than he did anyone else's in the family, had been able to stay home, too. However, Aunt Clara took him to the mall to buy him new clothes and a new pair of sneakers Saturday afternoon. Jennifer went to a matinee with her friends. Before she left, she stopped to gloat by the sewing room, where I was ironing clothes.

"Everyone's meeting for pizza, and then we're going to the movies. I'm sitting with Brad," she bragged, "so no matter what you think, he really is interested in me."