Bad Bad Girl

“Well did he?” Neely continued to press.

“He pulled down my pants but left my panties on,” Rebecca confessed, trying not to look at Caine.

“Then he definitely has feelings for you,” Neely added. “That is a very intimate act.”

“Agreed,” Caine said. “Sawyer doesn’t go to spank parties or anything like that. It isn’t a game or for fun for him.”

Rebecca nodded. “He said as much right before he did it.”

“Well then, I think you know your answer as to whether Sawyer cares or not,” Caine concluded. He stood up on his final word. “And with that, ladies, I have hit my max on girl talk. You two have fun.” He leaned down and kissed Neely on the forehead before turning and going inside.

Rebecca glared at Neely. “I could kill you. Really? In front of Caine?”

Neely shrugged, with a huge smile on her face. “What?” she asked innocently. “We needed a male perspective.”

Rebecca rolled her eyes and picked up her empty glass, signaling that she wanted more to drink. Neely was happy to oblige. “Can we change the subject please? I’ve had enough spanking talk to last me a lifetime.”

Neely smiled warmly. “Fine. What else are you up to?”

“I’m going to quit my job. I hate it,” Rebecca announced.

Her friend didn’t seem shocked. “Sounds like a good idea. I never thought it was a right fit for you.”

“Yeah. I’m not sure what I’m going to do, but Coley told me about this spiritual retreat I thought I would check out. She said it does wonders for her when she needs some time to figure things out. At this point in my life, what do I have to lose?”

Neely nodded in agreement. “Just be careful. Coley goes to some crazy places.”

“I know she does, but I feel so lost. My life feels like it’s spiraling, and heading in a direction I don’t want it to go. I need to find the person I once was. I need to figure it all out. So if some hippy dippy retreat helps me, then I’m all for it.”

Neely just smiled as she took a sip of her drink.

“So, I saw this article about how as the years progress, men are growing more facial hair and shaving less. You know, the whole ‘lumberjack’ trend. Anyway, the article then goes on to say that as the years progress, women are doing the opposite and keeping less and less hair on their vaginas, even going so far as to shave theirs bald.” Rebecca smiled as she took a drink of her mimosa to control the impending giggle. “Isn’t that the craziest thing you’ve ever heard? The article even had a break down by decade. Apparently, my bush is stuck in the 90s.”

Neely laughed. Not just laughed, actually, guffawed was more like it. “What?” She laughed so hard that tears started to wet her eyes.

“It’s true. It says that starting back from the year 2000, we should all have bare bushes.”

Neely continued to laugh. “What do you have?”

“Well… I have the landing strip, I guess you could say. What about you? Are you stuck in the 90s with me? Come on, you can tell me. There’s no shame.”

“No!” Tears started streaming down Neely’s face as she laughed even harder. “I’m bare, and have been forever!”

Rebecca had never seen Neely laugh so hard. “What? You’re completely bare?”

“Yes!”

“Come on! Are you telling me this article is right? Am I behind the times? Oh my God! I have a 90s bush!” The realization that she wasn’t up on the current grooming habits set in.

“Ha! You have a goatee bush! Well, at least it isn’t permed.” Neely continued her fit of giggles, loud enough that her neighbors could hear. “I’m laughing so hard, I think I may pee myself.”

“Seriously! Why did I not know about this? Are you telling me that it’s normal to not have any hair down there?”

Neely nodded, her face red from lack of oxygen. “Yes, well, unless you are a granola.”

“Granola? What the hell is that?” Where had she been all these years?

“Hippie. They let it all hang out.” Neely’s attack of giggles continued. “At least you don’t have a full bush.”

“No, then I’d have a 70s bush based on that damn article. But it’s still bad that I have a 90s bush. God! Why did no one tell me?”

“Didn’t you notice when we were sweating our asses off in the sauna?”

“No! It’s not like I examine others women’s hoohas!” Rebecca took another drink, taking in the insanity that she had somehow missed this important female hygiene memo. “So…” She paused for a moment, trying to figure it all out. “So, you just shave the whole thing?”

Neely continued to laugh and nodded. “Yes, or you could wax it. Haven’t you heard of the Brazilian?”

“Yes, but I can’t imagine having the hair ripped off my pussy lips with hot wax!” As if the Gods were against her, Caine walked outside right as Rebecca said the words, ‘pussy lips’.