"We'll deal with all that later. Brenda," Celia told her. "Well just take a ride to your house later this week."
Brenda relaxed a little more and sat on one of the two beds. They were separated by a small night table on which they had a clack and a phone. Except for what looked like a print landscape on the wall behind the beds, the room was stark. There were no posters, no pictures, not even any on the dressers or the desk. The bathroom was half the size of any of ours at home, if that. I could see that it was an older building. I imagined the attraction was simply the excitement of being on your own. To me, it was a little disappointing. I imagined Mama wouldn't have been very impressed, either.
"I'm supposed to call Mama as soon as I got here," I remembered.
"Then what are you waiting for? Call her," Brenda said, handing me the phone.
I tapped out our number quickly and waited. It rang and rang. Brenda raised her eyebrows and stepped closer. Finally, Mama picked up.
"It's me. Mama. I'm here at the dormitory." "Oh, how nice. You had a good trip. then?"
"Yes, it was easy. How are you?"
"I'm fine." she said. "The pain is not so bad now."
"Let me speak to her," Brenda demanded. and I handed her the phone. "Mama, what's wrong? Why didn't you come?" She listened. "You never told me any of this. No. no. I'm not angry," she said. "I will. She's fine. We'll take good care of her." she added, looking at me. "Okay, Mama. We'll call you right after the game and tell you about it. I hope so. Celia and I will come see you as soon as we can, I know, but we want to." she said. "Okay. Call you later," she concluded, and hung up.
"I'm sure it's all psychosomatic." Celia said.
Brenda nodded, Then she looked at me as if she had just realized I had arrived. "Look at you. A bigshot teenager now," she said. and poked me in the shoulder. Celia laughed.
"Let's get you settled in the guest room, and then we'll show you around," Celia said.
"Thanks." I looked at Brenda. She had a tight smile on her face.
"I'm glad vou're here." she finally admitted. "You'll see us whip their asses good."
Finally. I could smile, too.
The guest room just had a single bed, a dresser, and a desk and chair in it. It had one curtained window. I put my bag in the closet, and we went off immediately to grab some lunch at one of their favorite places. Brenda ate lightly. I wanted to have one of the big burgers. but I ordered a salad as well. Brenda immediately started in on me about my regained weight.
Before I could offer any excuses. Celia went into a long explanation about why some people are self-destructive. She concluded by saying, "April's problem isn't hard to see. Brenda. She has low selfesteem at the moment and needs to be reassured about herself. It's a crazy cycle. April," she said, turning to me. "You don't receive compliments, so you don't take care of yourself, and therefore, you don't receive compliments. You reinforce your low self-esteem without realizing you're doing that."
"Are you sure you don't want to go into psychology?" Brenda asked her. "You haven't met anyone you didn't want to analyze,"
"Maybe I will, Look, this situation is classic. Your sister grew up in a
house where you were the star. You were getting all the accolades. Brenda."
"She could have tried harder. She was lazy. She's still lazy," Brenda said. She didn't look at me. The two of them were discussing me as if I weren't even there,
"It's not laziness. exactly." Celia said. "Oh, what is it then. Doctor?"
"Well, you told me yourself how your teammates wouldn't try very hard if they fell too far behind. You said you felt all alone out there many times. Well, she's just fallen too far behind."
Brenda thought a moment and then just shook her head and smiled at Celia. "You're too smart for your own good. You know that?'
"Of course, I know that. You just said I was too smart."
The two of them laughed. Celia leaned forward and wiped some salad dressing off Brenda's cheek. They stared at each other for a moment and then. finally. Brenda looked at me.
"I've got to rest a bit and then go limber up in the vim. Celia will show you around."
"I don't have to see anything," I said.
"I'll just take you for a walk around the school," Celia said. "Brenda says you'd like to see the library."
I shrugged, and Brenda smirked. "You know why you don't have any energy or interest in anything, April'? You're not trying. You're using Mama as an excuse not to join anything."