I took so long, she came to my door.
"Hey, C'mon, April. I want to show you the campus." she said.
She was dressed in a pair of jeans, with a design made of pearls along the calves, and a tight black top with a black leather jacket. I couldn't deny she was beautiful in a striking way. Anyone's eyes would go to her in a crowd. Why didn't she have a line of boyfriends at her door?
I decided to be petulant.
"How come you don't have a date for the game?" I asked her. I felt smug and confident. It was like tossing water in her beautiful face.
She just smiled back instead.
And she said, "I do. You're my date. April."
10 April's Date
. Maybe it was my overworked imagination, but I thought everyone was looking at us. The young men on and around the campus were obviously drawn to Celia. Why wouldn't they be? She was so beautiful, and it was for sure they weren't looking at me. Celia didn't acknowledge their looks or their catcalls. She seemed to walk through it all like someone walking through fog. Yet that tight small smile never left her lips. I thought she enjoyed her effect on them, but that was all she seemed to do. How could someone so beautiful be so indifferent to them? Wasn't there one who attracted her? Why was beauty so squandered on her? Why couldn't I have that sort of beauty?
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw young men wave after us with disgust, clearly saying it was a waste of time to look, to call, even to try to catch Celia's attention. They knew, They knew what I had refused to know. Now, everything I saw and every word I heard reconfirmed the truth building inside me. This isn't my sister's roommate; this is my sister's lover. The constant question swirling around in my mind was, where did I belong in all this?
I felt truly dazed while Celia showed inc things, described things, talked about the school, her classes, the city itself. I vaguely listened, like someone working with music in the background. I knew it was there, knew that her words were there, but I was somehow withdrawn.
It was different in the gymnasium. I couldn't ignore anything. It reminded me too much of the high school games I had attended, either by myself or earlier with Daddy and Mama. It brought back those memories, the building excitement, the noise, the cheerleaders. It always felt like an event, and with the emphasis this school placed on female athletics, it was no different.
There was a group of boys in the bleachers who were there simply to mock the girls. There were always some in high school who were like that, but these boys looked drunk or high on something, because they were so loud and conspicuous. I saw the referee warn them, and then a woman who was probably a teacher at the school chastised them as well. They calmed down, but as soon as the game was under way, they were back at their shouts and howls.
I had watched Brenda play in competition many times, of course. and I always noted how the other members of her teams treated her with deference and respect. Right from the beginning, it was clear that they were looking to her for direction and momentum. Her energy drove her teammates. She was making shots and intimidating the opposition so aggressively and determinedly that after a while, even the boys who had come to mock the game settled into a quiet appreciation. They simply couldn't take their eyes off her. I realized that in the short time she had been away at college, she had become so much better than she had been. The quality of the competition probably sharpened her skills. She drew fouls periodically, and every time she went to the foul line to shoot, she looked our way. Celia didn't wave or anything, but I could tell they were exchanging more than just a glance,
Despite Brenda's superior abilities, the game remained very close and exciting, because there were girls on the other team who were quite good as well. I forgot everything, lost myself in the battle. and grew hoarse shouting. It was in the last two minutes that the game was determined. Almost as if Brenda were the heroine in a movie, it fell to her to make the final shot. The ball teetered for a second or so on the rim and then fell through as the buzzer sounded. Her teammates converged on her. It was actually the most exciting game I had ever seen her play.
"Isn't she wonderful?" Celia said. The fans were rushing down the stands around us. but Celia remained stated, calm, her face full of light, as she watched Brenda greeting people, hugging teammates.
"She's like some graceful new animal out there. She glides and floats and does such wondrous things with her body, doesn't she?"
"Yes." I said, amazed at how taken Celia was with my sister. I certainly appreciated Brenda's abilities, but Celia's reaction was more than
admiration. She seemed to be in utter awe. She turned to me.
"I'm so sorry your mother couldn't be here to see this. Brenda would have been so happy, too."
"I tried to get her to come. I really did!"
"Oh. I'm sure you did, April. I'd be the last one to blame you."
"Brenda probably does," I muttered. "She looked so angry when she first saw me."
"No, she doesn't blame you. She gets that way when she is disappointed, but she loves you. She really does."
Yeah, right, I mouthed.
"C'mon, let's wait for her in the hallway. It's too hard to let to her right now."
We left the gym and sat on a bench outside the girls' locker room, where we watched the other students walking by and saw members of the opposing team rushing away with the shadows of disappointment splashed over their faces like ink.
"I feel sorry for them." Celia told me. "but Brenda never does. She says if she feels sorry after beating someone, she'll never be competitive enough. What strength she possesses."
"I know," I said. but I said it sadly, as though it were a disease she had and not a good quality.
Celia gave me a sideward glance and then put her arm around me and squeezed me to her.