"Now, are you telling me the truth this time?" he asked. and I blanched. Did he see through me and know that I was less interested in chess than I was in him?
"What do you mean?"
"Do you really know the way home?"
"Oh," I said, relieved at what he was asking. I showed him a paper on which I had written the directions I had gotten yesterday.
"Okay," he said, holding the door.
I stood there looking at him. In a burst of courage, I stepped up on my toes and gave him a peck on the cheek.
"Thank you," I said quickly, and got into the car. I was afraid to look up at him.
He wore a look of amusement when he closed the door. I started the engine, put it in reverse, and looked at him to wave good-bye, but he had already turned to go back into his house.
I'd made a dumb fool of myself. I thought. My eyes were so full of tears by the time I reached the corner of his street that I thought I would have trouble driving. I sucked in my breath, bit down on my lip, and tried to shake the feeling of stupidity and embarrassment off, but it was with me all the way home.
15 Us Against the World
. Brenda wasn't home when I arrived. Celia came out of their room as soon as I entered to tell me Brenda had gone with her teammates to practice and would have a light dinner with them afterward.
"You're pretty late," she said. "Peter Smoke again?"
"Yes. He taught me more about chess."
"Only chess?" she asked, swinging her eyes. "Only chess," I repeated sternly.
"What is that?" she asked, seeing the dream catcher.
"Something Peter gave me. It's called a dream catcher. You hang it over your bed, and it keeps nightmares away."
"If only it worked," she said.
"Maybe it does," I told her. "Maybe you just have to believe in it. Maybe the trouble is you don't believe in anything." I added sharply.
She laughed after me as I charged through the house toward the rear door. "What do you want to do for dinner?" she called.
I paused. "You go where you want," I said. "I'm just making a couple of eggs for myself."
I closed the door before she could respond and hurried across the small yard to my apartment. The first thing I did was hang the dream catcher above my pull-out sofa bed. I had just finished when I heard Celia knocking at the door.
"What?"
"Can I come in?" she asked.
"Come in." I said, and plopped on the sofa. I folded my arms across my breasts and glared ahead.
She stood in the doorway, looking at me. "What's wrong. April?"
"Nothing."
"Look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make fun of the dream catcher. I actually know what they are and have a great deal of respect for Indian spiritualism. I took a course in comparative religions and was amazed at the similarities between Native American religion and Far Eastern religion."
"That's nice.," I said.
"Something else is bothering you besides my flippant remarks." I didn't answer. She stood there, holding the door open.
"I know how it is when you have no one to talk to I had no one for most of my life. It's all right. I want to help you," she said.