the doll.
18 Follow the Wheel
. I made no attempt to wake Uncle Palaver. I didn't think I could if I tried, anyway. He reeked of bourbon and was snoring away now. I simply closed the door on the bedroom and returned to my bunk. Sleep for me was almost impossible, even though I was so tired. The muffled sound of the voices on the tape recorder leaking out of the bedroom kept me tossing and turning. Toward morning. I finally passed out. and I didn't awaken until I heard the engine start. I listened hard for the voices, but I didn't hear them. I lay there with my eyes opened, staring at the motor home ceiling and wondering if what I had heard and seen the night before was really just a terrible nightmare.
Gazing into the motor home. I didn't see Uncle Palaver. The bottle of bourbon was gone. Suddenly, the vehicle jerked and moved forward,
"Uncle Palaver?"
"Hey," he called back. "I'm just moving us along here a little ways. I parked in a supermarket parking lot last night, and usually their security comes around and raps on the door if they see I'm there too long. It's just another ten miles to a turnoff, and we'll stop and make some breakfast," he said.
He sounded clear-headed and okay. I climbed down from the bunk and looked toward the bedroom door, which was still closed.
He glanced at me. "Sleep okay?" he asked as he drove.
I held my breath and didn't speak, wondering if I should ask him about the tape recorder. Should I tell him I had gone into the bedroom? Should I ask him about the doll in the bed? Ask him about Destiny?
Something told me it was better to wait to have him tell me everything,
"Yes." I said. "Fine."
"Great. We'll have some breakfast in a few minutes," he said.
I went to the bathroom, washed, and quickly put on my jeans and sweatshirt. I felt him pull us off the highway and park the motor home. When I came out, he was already in the little kitchenette, pouring me a glass of orange juice.
"When I park for a longer period. I expand the walls, but we'll be here only to have breakfast," he explained. "What would you like? I went out and bought some eggs early this morning at that supermarket, and some rolls and a few Danish."
"I don't eat that much anymore, Uncle Palaver."
"Oh. Well, it's here if you want it. What do you want?"
"I'll just have a soft-boiled egg," I said. "I can make it." I added quickly. "Go on and sit. I'll wait on you."
"Oh. I don't sit," he said. "I have to prepare something for Destiny. She likes a little hot oatmeal." he added, nodding at the range. He did have a pot on it and oatmeal cooking.
I stared at it and then looked at him, my heart skipping beats. Why was he doing this, pretending she was really back there? Was he doing it for my sake, hiding tragic news? Fie rattled on about her, stunning me so with the way he spoke about her that for a few moments. I couldn't move.
"She's upset that I'm doing all this. that I just don't put her in some facility and forget her. She thinks she's a terrible burden on me. It's been this way for some time, but if you really care for someone, you don't dispose of them just because they're in trouble.
"Your father didn't understand that. He thought he was doing you all a big favor by inventing that fantasy about his deserting you so you wouldn't suffer with him, but he broke your mother's heart. Loving someone means taking them on for better or for worse, just as it says in the marriage vow. People break their contracts with each other so easily these days. In every way," he added, turning to me. Apparently, he didn't notice my amazed look or read anything more in it than my surprise at his domestic abilities.
"They're quick to breach agreed business arrangements. People today say the contract's not worth more than the paper it's written on, and for good reason. No one lives up to his word, to his promises, anymore.
"Well. I'm not built like that. I make a commitment: I live up to it or break my neck trying, and I expect other people to treat me the same way. Of course, they don't. I can't tell you how many scheduled performances were canceled on me at the last minute .
"Destiny and I had an act that worked on the road. She was an integral part of it. When she got sick," he said, stirring the pot of oatmeal. "I came up with this idea to keep us going as an act. I had always used a little ventriloquism in my act, you know.
You knew that. right?"
I shook my head.
"Yes, I did. And when we were in Atlanta, I got
friendly with this puppet maker. I told him my idea, and he thought it was terrific, a challenge, so he worked hard on it. He actually visited us and took pictures of Destiny. The likeness is remarkable, just remarkable, don't you think?"
I nodded, still dumbfounded. What should I have said? I never met her, so how would I know?
"Anyway, we're still a hit on the road."