Willow (DeBeers 1)

ither heaven or hell," he added with a small laugh, "I really respect him. though. I want to do well in his class."

He continued to talk about his work as if my father's death were just another event in the course of a day. I imagined he was simply frying to help me get my mind off it for a while. That was the purpose of visitors at a time like this, wasn't it? Allan was simply trying to ease my pain.

"Will you come right back afterward?" he asked finally.

"As soon as I can straighten out all that has to be done. I will." "Well, is there anything you want me to do for you at school, Willow?"

"No."

"Keep your chin up. I'll miss you. but I'll keep myself busy until you return. Call me if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay," I said. I was waiting to hear more to hear how much he cherished me, how much he wished he could be at my side to comfort me and hold me. I was waiting to hear him say "I love you."

"Oh," he said as if he had forgotten to tell me one more important detail. "Love you.'

"Love you, too," I said.

I felt so empty inside after I hung up. His call should have filled me with more warmth, helped me face the next moment. I lay there staring up at the ceiling until I heard a knock at my bedroom door,

"Willow?" Margaret Selby called. "Are you awake?"

"Yes," I said, sitting up. "Come in."

She opened the door and peered in first, "It's all right. Margaret. Come in."

"Oh, good," she said as if she were escaping from someone in the hallway.

She was now wearing a black crepe bolero jacket over a fit and flared slip dress, Ordinarily. I would have thought it a very pretty outfit, but once again, she looked as if she had bought it before she gained an additional dozen or so pounds.

"Mother thought this would be appropriate," she said, turning. "What do you think?"

"Anyone who's worried about clothes at a time like this is a candidate for my father's clinic," I muttered, then rose and went into the bathroom.

"Well, it just shows respect if you look good. Willow, If I wore a pair of jeans, even designer jeans, it wouldn't be very nice, now, would it?"

She heard the tinkle, "Are you peeing?" she cried.

"Voiding urine." I replied.

"Ugh. Close the door. My goodness, you'd never know we're from the same family." she complained.

I flushed the toilet and stripped to jump into the shower.

"Mother sent me up here to tell you your father's accountant and his wife have arrived," she called, "She thinks you should come downstairs. Oh, and your mother's brothers and their wives are coming to the funeral, as well as your cousins Lucille Ann, Merrilou. Branson, and Lance. Isn't Lance the goodlooking one?"

I didn't reply. I stepped into the shower, which drowned her out, but she didn't stop talking. When I shut off the water and stepped out of the stall, she was in the middle of a sentence, apparently describing some time in the past when she had a crush on my cousin Lance. I wrapped the towel around myself and came out of the bathroom.

"Weddings and funerals bring families together." she concluded. "They will all be coming to my wedding in three months. I'm sure. We've invited them all, even your mother's relatives,

"Was there someone you wanted me to invite for you?" she asked, still trying to find out if I had a boyfriend at college.

"Margaret Selby," I said, turning to her. "I appreciate how much your wedding means to you and how excited you are about it, but believe me when I tell you. I can't think about anything but the fact that the day after tomorrow. I'll be burying my father beside my mother in the cold ground of the cemetery."

She stared at me a moment and then burst into tears. "I was only trying to keep you from thinking about it I didn't mean my wedding was more important than your father. I'm sorry. I--"

"Margaret,"

She turned and rushed out of my bedroom. I stared after her a moment and then turned to my closet to find something appropriate to wear. too. Daddy would tell me I was being too harsh on her. I'm sure. He had the amazing ability to look at everything from the other person's perspective. If I hoped to be anywhere nearly as successful as he was. I thought. I'd better learn how to do that better than I could at the moment.