Darkest Hour (Cutler 5)

"It's all in the Bible," she added, with a wry smile twisting her lips. "You just have to read it."

"You're a liar!" I shouted. She simply smiled at me in her cold way and then quickened her steps. "You're a terrible liar! Mamma has no guilt. There was no devil in my room and he hasn't taken Eugenia. Liar!" I cried, the tears streaming down my cheeks. She disappeared around a turn. Good riddance, I thought and followed slowly, my head down, the tears still dripping from my cheeks when I reached Niles, who had waited for me at his driveway.

"Lillian, what's wrong?" he cried, running to me.

"Oh Niles." My shoulders shook with my sobs so, he put his books down quickly and embraced me.

Quickly, between wails, I described what had happened, how Papa had beaten me, how Mamma had become increasingly strange.

"There, there," he said, kissing me softly on the forehead and cheeks, "I'm sorry your father struck you. If I were older, I'd go over there and give him what for," he declared. "I would."

He said it so firmly, I stopped my crying and lifted my head from his shoulder. Wiping my eyes, I looked into his and saw the anger he felt and I realized the love he had for me.

"I'd gladly endure the pain of a beating from Papa if something could be done for poor Mamma," I said.

"Maybe I can get my mother to go over to visit your mother and see what's become of her. Then she can ask your father to do something."

"Oh will you, Niles? That might help. Yes, it might. No one comes to see Mamma anymore, so no one knows how poorly she's doing."

"I'll mention it tonight at dinner," he promised. He wiped away my remaining tears with the back of his hand. "We'd better catch up," he said, "before Emily makes something sinful out of this, too."

I nodded. Of course, he was right, so we hurried on to get to school on time.

Niles's mother did pay a visit to The Meadows a few days later. Unfortunately, Mamma was asleep and Papa was away on one of his trips. She told Louella she would stop by another time, but when I asked Niles about it, he said his father had forbidden his mother to make another visit.

"My father says it's not our business and we shouldn't poke our noses into your family's affairs. I think," he said, lowering his head with some shame, "he's simply afraid of your father and his temper. I'm sorry."

"Maybe just go see Doctor Cory myself one day," I said. Niles nodded, even though we both knew I probably wouldn't. What he had said about Papa was true—he had a fiery temper and I was afraid to risk his anger. He might only stop the doctor from coming and then beat me for asking him.

"Maybe she'll just get better herself," Niles wished. "My mother says time heals all wounds eventually. Papa says it's just taking your mother a little longer, but we should all be patient."

"Maybe," I said, but not without much hope. "The only one who shows any real concern is Louella, but as you know, she's leaving very soon now."

The remaining days that I had with Louella passed much too quickly until the morning of her departure came. When I awoke and realized it, I was reluctant to get up and go down to face the good-byes, but then I thought how terrible it would be for Louella to leave without my saying good-bye. I got dressed as quickly as I could.

Henry was taking Louella and her things to Upland Station where she would begin to make the connections that would take her to her sister in South Carolina. He loaded her trunks on the wagon while all the workers and servants gathered around to say farewell. Everyone had grown to love Louella and there were tears in most everyone's eyes, some of the chambermaids, especially Tottie, crying openly.

"Now y'all see here," Louella declared when she stepped out on the porch, her hands on her hips. She wore her Sunday church clothes and her bonnet. "I ain't going to my grave. I'm just going to lend a hand to my older sister who's retired and retire myself. Some of you are crying because you're just jealous," she flared and there was a ripple of laughter. Then she stepped off the porch and hugged and kissed them all and sent them off to begin their daily chores.

Papa had said his good-bye the night before when he had called her into his office to give her money toward her retirement. I stood nearby the door and.

I heard him formally thank her for being a good household servant, loyal and honest. His tone of voice was cold and official, even though she had been at The Meadows so long she could recall him as a young boy.

"Of course," he said at t

he end, "I wish you good luck and a healthy, long life."

"Thank you, Mr. Booth," Louella said. There was a short pause and then I heard her say, "If I could just say one thing, sir, before I leave."

"Yes?"

"It's Mrs. Booth, sir. She don't look and act good to me. She's pining away over her dead little girl and . . ."

"I'm very well aware of Mrs. Booth's ridiculous behavior, Louella, thank you. She will come to her senses soon, I'm sure, and go on with her life and be a mother to our other children, as she should, as well as a wife to me. Don't let it concern you a moment more."

"Yes sir," Louella said, her voice dripping with disappointment.

"Well then, good-bye," Papa concluded. I hurried away from the door so Louella wouldn't know I had been eavesdropping.