"I think it was something he wanted only me to
know right now, Cary. I don't feel right talking about
it. I hope you understand."
"Oh. Sure," he said, although his eyes betrayed
his hurt. It wasn't a time for a father to keep secrets
from his son. "I understand. It must have been pretty
important to him, though. He was willing to chance
dying to do it, huh?"
I nodded and we went to the vending machine.
We brought Aunt Sara her tea and May her soda and
then Cary went to check on Uncle Jacob one final
time. He returned to say Aunt Sara could go in with
him now and Aunt Sara decided they should take May
so she would see Uncle Jacob was still alive. I waited for them in the lounge, thinking about
the things Uncle Jacob had said. He sensed death at
his door and felt he had to confess to me. I realized
how much blame he had carried in his heart all these
years, but I doubted if he was the main cause of any
sins Mommy had committed afterward.
"He'
s stabilized," Cary told me after they
emerged from CCU. "Let's go home and get some
sleep. We're all exhausted."
I couldn't argue with that. May actually fell
asleep in my arms on the way home and Aunt Sara
looked as if she would topple herself any moment.
Cary helped her out of the car and into the house. She
wanted to go to the kitchen to do some final cleanup,
but he insisted she go right upstairs and get to bed. "Dad's going to need you stronger than ever,
Ma. You can't run yourself down now," he said with