"I never approved of how Belinda was treated during her pregnancy. Olivia was embarrassed about it, of course, and kept her out of sight, literally a prisoner in her home. I wasn't the one to complain, for obvious reasons, although I did express as much disapproval as I could.
"In short, the pregnancy, the imprisonment, her history of promiscuity, drinking, they all took their toll and she became a rather disturbed woman after Haille's birth. We consulted with a doctor, a psychiatrist friend of mine, who recommended an institutionalized setting. In the beginning we--I hoped it would be temporary, but it went on and on."
"Because that was what Grandma Olivia wanted--her embarrassment shut away."
He looked at me and then lowered his eyes with shame.
"You have to understand my predicament at the time. I was married. I had children. Kenneth had recently been born. I was in politics."
"She threatened you. If you didn't cooperate, she threatened you," I concluded. He didn't deny it.
"Ironically, it might have been the best thing for Belinda anyway. I did visit her whenever it was possible."
"To ease your conscience," I accused, my eyes fixed unflinchingly on him. He returned my gaze and shook his head.
"When you look at me like that, you resemble Olivia more than Belinda. I could never hide my weaknesses from her, nor my shame. I know Olivia holds you in higher regard than you think," he added.
"It's like being complimented by the devil."
"Oh, she's not all that bad. She's had a difficult life and she's done well. She's actually been Samuel's strength. He owes his success to her."
"I know. She lets everyone know how indebted they are to her, especially me," I muttered. I looked up at him again sharply. "Since I first visited Grandma Belinda, Grandma Olivia has had them give Belinda medicine that keeps her in a daze, and she tried to keep me from visiting."
"Oh? I didn't know that."
"Well now you do."
He nodded.
"I'll see that it stops," he promised.
"Somehow, someone should make it possible for her to come home," I said, tears in the corners of my eyes.
"Yes," he said in a tired, defeated, voice, "only where is her home now? Where she is, I'm afraid," he replied to his own question.
"Maybe someday I'll be able to make a home for her."
"Maybe you will," he agreed.
"First, I have to find my own home," I said. "I want to know who my real father is."
"If I knew, I would tell you, but Haille never confided anything intimate to me. I just know it's not Kenneth, thank God. What a mess that would have been. Sins of the father," he muttered and shook his head.
"For what it's worth to you," he added, as I started to turn away, "my home is always open to you."
I thought about this and then just nodded without reply.
I wish there was some way I could earn your forgiveness, Melody," he said.
"It's not my forgiveness you need."
Unable to look at me, he finished the whiskey in his glass.
"I've got to go home," I said.
"Of course.I'll fetch Morton."
We walked out into the hallway.