Olivia (Logan 5)

"Thank you, Daddy. You look very handsome and distinguished."

"Only for you," he said with a sigh. "Well, then, I gue

ss we're about ready. It's time."

I gazed at myself one last time and then started out, pausing in the doorway to look back at the bed and the furniture, the pictures and the curtains.

"It's going to be pretty empty around here with you gone, Olivia," Daddy remarked when he saw where my eyes lingered.

"I'll be here often, Daddy. You know that, and you'll be at my home often, too."

"Aye, but I'm not the sort who interferes in other people's lives, especially my daughter's," he said.

"You won't be interfering."

He nodded.

"Are we going?" we heard Belinda cry frantically. "I haven't done my makeup properly yet!"

"Do it in the limousine," I said. "You'll still be doing it as I walk down the aisle anyway."

Daddy laughed and Belinda moaned and complained, but followed us down the stairs and out the door.

Carmelita and Jerome stood by smiling and complimenting me on my appearance. They congratulated Daddy and we got into the limousine.

As we drove off, I glanced back only once and focused on the windows I knew were in Mother's bedroom. In my imagination I saw the curtains part and her smiling face as she threw me a kiss. There were tears of joy. I sucked in my breath, swallowed a small moan and looked out the side window at the passing scenery, my mind on nothing at all. Finally, I realized what I was doing. I was so in a daze, I hardly heard Belinda's constant stream of babble, her complaints and worries about how she would look in pictures. She badgered Daddy, drawing compliments from him until she finally appeared satisfied with herself.

"Look at all the people!" she cried as we approached the church. "I'm as excited as I would be on my own wedding day and I don't even have a steady boyfriend these days!"

"Would you like to change places with me?" I challenged.

She raised her eyebrows, looked at Daddy, and laughed.

"Hardly," she said. "I'm going to marry a movie star or a musician, not some boring businessman."

"Your father's a businessman," I reminded her.

"That's different," she said gazing at me with that sweet, flirtatious little smile. "He's my father."

She said it firmly, almost as if she somehow knew that he wasn't mine.

As Daddy escorted me down the aisle, some of the people who looked up at me from their pews still wore faces of disbelief. Even the sight of me in my wedding gown, the organ playing, the minister waiting at the altar with Samuel and Nelson standing by, both looking handsome and distinguished, the mountain of flowers, the bridesmaids, none of it wiped the incredulous looks off their skeptical faces. I could see the questions and hear the gossip. How did Olivia Gordon win the heart of a man as handsome as Samuel Logan? Did her father buy her a husband? Green eyes of young unattached women still waiting for their dream lovers and perfect husbands glared at me. I gazed straight ahead, defiant and secure.

Nelson wore that impish grin on his lips as I stepped up to the altar. Samuel was beaming, his shoulders straight, his chest out. The guests fell into a hush as the minister began the ceremony, the recitation of words and the prayers and promises that would bind me forever to this man and this man to me.

As I recited my vows, I let my eyes shift so I could see Nelson standing there and I fantasized for a moment that it was he and not Samuel I was marrying. When he handed Samuel the wedding ring, he leaned over to give me a kiss on the cheek. It wasn't part of the rehearsal. I heard a few gasps behind me, and my heart jumped and fluttered as a hot blush stung my face. Samuel didn't appear to notice, or if he did, he thought it was he who had filled me with excitement.

The exchange of rings occurred and the words were spoken. When the minister pronounced us man and wife, the organ player began and there were cheers. Samuel kissed me and I kept my eyes closed so I could imagine they were Nelson's lips. Then we hurried up the aisle as children and some of the adults rained rice over us.

We got into the limousine quickly and were rushed away to prepare for the wedding reception. Samuel looked so happy. His eyes were like two small bulbs, full of brightness and joy.

"Well Mrs. Logan," he declared. "I bet all this feels like a dream to you."

"Yes," I admitted. "That it does."

"Should I pinch you?"

"No, Samuel. That's quite all right. I'll pinch myself if I feel the need," I said and he laughed and threw his arm around me, drawing me closer to him. I closed my eyes and for the first time wondered if I could really be a wife.