Olivia (Logan 5)

"Belinda?" I laughed. "She wants everything unpleasant to disappear. She always has. She's a lot like my mother in that way, but this time it won't work."

"You mean you won't let it."

"I mean we'll bear the burden of our

responsibilities. What she has done affects us. Surely, you won't want me to turn the child out of our home, Samuel. You're not that sort of a man and that's why I wanted to marry you in the first place," I said. "You credit me with intelligence; credit me with the perception to see your good qualities, too, Samuel."

He gazed at me and I kept my eyes so fixed on him and so full of sincerity, he swallowed down my words and felt good about it. I could see his ego inflate like a life raft.

"Well, if you put it that way, I suppose we could manage it fine. It's not a question of money or anything and as you say, the child carries your family blood. Is it what you really think we should do, Olivia?"

"I wouldn't do it otherwise, Samuel. I'm sorry I didn't come right to you with the problem, but I was sorting it out in my own mind first. I was going to tell you everything today."

He nodded.

"All right then," he said. "I do feel sorry for Belinda though," he said in a wistful tone. "She's made some mess for herself."

"With someone else's help," I reminded him. He raised his eyebrows.

"Yes. Well," he said slapping the arms of the chair as he stood, "every family has its skeletons in closets, Ours won't be the first, huh?"

"Hardly," I said.

"Is there anything I should do?" he asked.

"Tell Nelson Childs to stop sending emissaries and accept his responsibility. Tell him to be half the man you are, Samuel," I said.

He smiled.

"I don't think he'd like to hear that, Olivia." He started for the door and stopped. "How are we going to handle Belinda? I mean . . ."

"Leave it all to me, Samuel. It's mostly all female problems anyway from here on until she gives birth," I said.

"Yes. Yes, I suppose you're right." He thought a moment. "Sorry I came bursting in on you like that."

"It's all right, Samuel. I understand and once again, I'm sorry I didn't speak to you sooner."

He smiled.

"Would you like me to take you to lunch today, Olivia? We haven't done that in a while."

I thought a moment.

"Yes, Samuel," I said. "Yes, I would."

His smile broadened and then he left. I sat there quietly in my office listening to the tick-tock of the miniature grandfather clock on the shelf. Was I a monster for handling Samuel that way? The only one left for Nelson to petition was Belinda and that would be the most futile effort of all. She would do exactly as I told her to do and he wouldn't understand why. He wouldn't understand that I had really been more of a mother to her than our own mother.

The next evening that was exactly what he tried. He pleaded with- her on the phone and offered to take care of everything if she would just do what he wanted. She came down to the living room where I was reading and listening to music to tell me. She was very excited. In her mind it solved the problem.

"He knows a place where I can go to have the baby and he'll make sure the baby has a good family. He's right, isn't he, Olivia? I can't raise a baby and I can't put that on you and Samuel. You have your own children to raise."

"He's not right. We've had this conversation. I don't want to hear another word on it."

"But I don't want to have a baby, Olivia. I don't want to . . ."

I rose from my seat with such fury, she cowered before me.

"You don't want to have a baby? You don't want . ." "Olivia, please."