“Anything else I can do?” he asked Julia.
“No. Get Clifford settled in, look after yourself, and I’ll take care of things here.”
He kissed me good night and hurried off. Julia examined my ankle again and looked at me askance. The skepticism settled in the corners of her mouth when she smiled.
“It doesn’t look bad, Lorelei, no swelling, no redness, nothing.”
“I’m fine. Just very tired suddenly.”
I could see the suspicion narrowing her eyelids. “What really happened back there, Lorelei? You weren’t just complaining about an ankle. I’ve gotten to know you better. Something was frightening you. I never saw you that intense.”
If there was ever a moment when I would seriously consider telling Julia the truth, this was it. She had become more of a sister to me than any I had, and I believed her when she told me how much she cherished our friendship and love for each other. She was sincere in her hope that we would grow as family, share our problems, and rejoice in our successes and happiness. How could I go on lying and deceiving someone like her?
But what would happen if I did tell her the truth? Wouldn’t she be terrified of me and frantically worried for her brother and father? Surely there would be no way we could go on together, and even if somehow she was able to handle the truth, believe in my effort to have a normal life and reject the world I had been in, how could she not forever wonder whether the genes within me would eventually overcome any resistance I had created? There would never be a wholly peaceful and pure moment between us again.
“You’ll think so poorly of me if I tell you,” I said.
“Never, Lorelei. Trust me,” she said.
“I know exactly what you’re going to say. You’re going to blame it on my inexperienced, young imagination.”
“I’m hardly a woman of great experience,” she said. “You already know that. Stop worrying about it. What?”
I looked away, counted to five, and turned back to her. “I saw the way Liam was looking at this very beautiful young woman dancing close to us. He was practically drooling over her, and we’re on the threshold of our marriage.”
She smiled. “He’s only a man, Lorelei. We all want to idolize, even deify the one we fall in love with, ignoring his weaknesses and flaws and concentrating only on what is pleasing, but fantasies don’t last. We make them into our own private movie stars. The same is true for the way men idolize their women. Supposedly, Rita Hayworth was heard to say about herself that they went to bed with Gilda, the ravishing beauty she played in the movie, but woke up with Rita Hayworth.”
“You’re right, of course. I should know better. I reacted like an immature, jealous teenager and . . .”
“Pretended you hurt your ankle?”
“Yes.”
“I could tell. I’ve seen enough sprained ankles,” she said, and patted mine. “Considering the reputation my brother had before he met you, I don’t blame you for your overreaction at all.”
She laughed.
“Actually, I think it was kind of funny. He deserved it. And by the way, thanks for not including Clifford when you mentioned the drooling. I wasn’t as oblivious as I seemed out there. Whoever she was, she was like a magnet for male eyes.”
I smiled at her. She bought it completely, I thought. I
t was partly true, anyway, this time. I was jealous of how Ava had commanded Liam’s attention so easily and completely. I could live with this lie.
Julia yawned.
“I’ll let you get to sleep. You can claim it got miraculously better by morning. There’s a fresh nightgown in the closet and a brand-new toothbrush in the bathroom. We always treat our guests as if they were in a five-star hotel.”
“It is like that. Better, in fact.”
“You and Liam are going to live here for a while afterward, right?”
“Yes. We’ve talked about it. He wants to build a new house, but lately, your father’s been adamant about us living here for the first few years, at least.”
“I’m sure he hopes forever,” she said. “He wouldn’t want the property to go to anyone but family eventually, and it’s certainly big enough for you two to have your privacy. Clifford and I could easily move in, too, and no one would get in anyone’s way, especially with our busy schedules. We’ll see,” she said quickly. “Okay. Thanks for trusting me,” she added, and gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Tomorrow we’ll have another good laugh about it.”
She started out, paused at the doorway, and turned to whisper, “I think I’ll pay my radiologist a visit and make sure he’s still able to read an X-ray.”
In a moment, she was gone.