“This diary contains every member’s description of her first sexual experience,” Deidre said. “When you’ve had yours and you write it into the book, you can read the others. Place your right hand on the notebook.”
Were they serious? Was this some sort of joke? There wasn’t a smile on anyone’s face, and no eyes betrayed any humor. No one was going to leap to cry “April fool” or anything. They couldn’t have looked more serious in church.
I put my hand on the notebook.
“Repeat after me. I, Sasha Porter, do solemnly swear to share my most secret sexual thoughts with my sisters and with no one else.”
I repeated it.
“I hereby renounce virginity, and I will never betray any sister’s trust or speak of the VA club with anyone who is not a member.”
After I repeated that, all of the girls placed their right hands over mine. They all closed their eyes as if in silent prayer. I closed mine.
Each one hugged me and returned to her seat.
“Now, then,” Kiera said, smiling. “Let me tell you how I made love dangerously this week.”
Like kindergarten students gathering around their teacher to hear a story, the girls leaned forward. Despite what Kiera was about to describe, I found myself lost in my own thoughts.
More a single question.
What had I just sworn to do and to be?
27
The Oath
I was really proud of you in there,” Kiera said as we drove home. “A couple of the girls were worried you were too young. Of course, they don’t know your history. Growing up in the streets, seeing the things you’ve seen, has made you more mature than they are, I’m sure.”
“I didn’t see much more than poor people struggling to eat, Kiera.”
“You know what I mean.”
I didn’t, but I didn’t disagree with her. If she wanted to believe those things about me, fine. Right now, it looked like something of an advantage to have her think that way about me.
“But you can’t keep going to school dressed like a character in Alice in Wonderland or something,” she continued. “I’m going to give you more of my things to wear. My mother has to realize you’re not a ten-year-old, and boys won’t take you seriously if you look like you just walked off Sesame Street.”
“Ricky seems to like me,” I said.
“He’s one of us. Besides, he’s only one boy. You don’t want to become dependent upon one boy this early. That’s the whole point of our club. Girls get into this frenzy to have a relationship. Heaven forbid they not be asked out on a date or not have a date to the prom or something. We’re free of all that anxiety and pressure.” She smiled. “And it drives the boys crazy because we act so indifferent. We’re in more control of our own destinies. You see the point, right?”
“Yes,” I said. I did see the point. What she was saying made me feel a little better about what I had just sworn to do and to be.
Luckily, Mrs. March wasn’t home when we arrived. I didn’t have to greet her with my face full of deception immediately. We went right up to our rooms, but Kiera wanted me to come into hers after I settled in so she could choose some clothes for me to wear to school. That was where Mrs. March found us. Kiera had at least five outfits laid out on her bed.
“What’s all this?” she asked as soon as she entered Kiera’s suite.
“Clothes I’m lending Sasha, Mother. She doesn’t have anything really fashionable. Alena’s things are just not right for her now,” Kiera said.
“Fashionable? I hardly think the clothes you wear to school are what I would call fashionable, Kiera.”
“They are to me and to my friends, Mother,” she said with what I thought for Kiera was remarkable control. She eve
n smiled at her. “You just forget what it was like to be a teenager. I’m sure your mother complained about the things you wore.”
Mrs. March stepped closer to examine what was on the bed. “I don’t remember you wearing these things.”
“Why am I not surprised?” Kiera said, rolling her eyes. “Sasha likes them,” she added.