My Sweet Audrina (Audrina 1)

He hesitated and looked toward the door that Arden had opened. He stood there looking as distraught as I’d ever seen him, except when he was a boy in the woods who had no courage whatsoever.

“Go on, Damian,” said Arden, “tell her the truth. Tell her, yes, I was there, and I ran! Just as I’m going to leave now, for I see by your eyes that you hate me. But I’ll be back, Audrina.”

In the torturous days that followed, I refused to allow Arden into my room. He came with flowers, with candy, with pretty nightgowns and bed jackets, but I sent them all back to him.

“Tell him to giv

e them to Vera,” I said to Papa, who looked solemn as he saw the tears roll down my cheeks.

“You’re being very hard on him, although I can understand why. But you must hold on there, girl,” ordered Papa when I wanted to sleep. “Since the night of your fall, Arden and I have been through hell. I admit I never wanted you to marry Arden Lowe, yet you did, and his mother made me understand something I hadn’t understood before. And both you and I owe his mother a great deal. And if you owe her, you owe her son even more. Give Arden a chance, Audrina. He loves you … let him come in … please.”

I stared at him disbelievingly. Papa didn’t know that Arden had been planning to kill me and run off with Vera.

A gray-haired nurse opened my hospital door and stuck her head inside. “Time to go, Mr. Adare. I’m sure Mrs. Lowe will want to have a few minutes to spend with her husband.”

“No!” I said firmly. “Tell him to go away.”

I couldn’t see Arden yet. He’d been unfaithful with Vera. And he’d failed my dead sister when he might have saved her … and there was something else I had to figure out. Something elusive that kept evading me even as it whispered that I still didn’t know the whole truth about the First Audrina.

Days came and days went. I grew stronger as I was fed vitamins and high-protein food. Papa came to visit twice a day. I still refused to see Arden.

I was given physical therapy treatments to strengthen my legs and arms, and lessons on how to control all the muscles that had been so long unused. I was taught to walk again. In the three weeks I was in the hospital, not once did I allow Arden into my room. Then Papa came to take me home. Sylvia sat beside me.

“Arden wanted to come with us,” said Papa as he turned off the main highway. “Really, Audrina, you can’t put him off forever. You’ve got to talk this out with him.”

“Where’s Vera, Papa?”

He snorted in disgust. “Vera fell and broke her arm,” he said indifferently. “Egg-shell bones if ever I heard of any. Lord, the hospital bills I’ve paid to keep her whole.”

“I want her gone from our house.” My voice was hard. What happened between me and Arden depended on what happened between Vera and Arden.

“She’ll leave the day the cast comes off.” His voice was as hard and determined as mine. “I think Sylvia made her trip. Sylvia’s got a real hatred going for Vera.” He shot me a shrewd glance. “You really can’t blame Arden for what he did with her. Many a morning at breakfast, even before Vera came back, I noticed how unhappy he seemed. He’d smile when you were looking his way, but when you turned your head I could tell his nights with you left much to be desired—and it pleased me. I confess that.”

It pleased me, too, that I’d made him unhappy. I hoped Arden never lived long enough to have another happy hour. Ugly thoughts welled up out of me as we approached that tall, splendid and restored house. Whitefern. What a laugh to have been so proud that my ancestry was dated back to those who’d come ashore to settle in The Lost Colony.

With Papa supporting me on one side and Sylvia on the other, we slowly ascended the porch steps. Arden threw open the front door and came rushing out. He tried to kiss me. I jerked away. He then tried to take my hand. I snatched my hand from his and spat, “Don’t touch me! Go to Vera and find your solace—as you found it while I was in that coma.”

Pale and miserable looking, Arden stepped back and allowed Papa to guide me inside. Once we were inside, I fell onto the purple velvet lounge, now with its golden tassels and cording bright and new and all its stuffing covered over.

Now came the moment I’d dreaded, when I was left alone with Arden. Wearily I closed my eyes and tried to pretend he wasn’t there.

“Are you going to lie there with your eyes closed and say nothing? Won’t you even look at me?” Then his voice grew louder. “What the hell do you think I’m made of? You were in a coma and Vera was there, willing to do what she could to help me survive. You lay on that bed stiff and cold—and how was I to know that day by day you were gradually getting better when you never indicated in any way that you were?”

He got up to pace the room, never striding its full length but stalking back and forth the length of the chaise I lay on. With some difficulty I rose to my feet.

“I’m going upstairs. Please don’t follow me. I don’t need you anymore, Arden. I know you and Vera planned to kill me. I used to have such faith in you, such trust that I’d found the one man in this hateful world who would always be there when I needed him. But you failed me. You wanted me dead so you could have her!”

His face turned white and he was so shocked that his voice ran away and left him speechless, when he’d learned to be as garrulous as Papa. I used that opportunity to head for the stairs. In another moment he rushed to stop me, catching me easily since I moved so slowly.

“What’s ahead for us now that you hate me?” he asked hoarsely. Without answering I passed on by the room we’d shared, though when I looked in there I saw my regular large bed was back, and the narrow one had been carted away. Everything had been refurbished, so there was nothing left to remind me of all those dreadful days when I’d lain there unmoving and waiting to die.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

What right did he have to ask me anything? He didn’t belong in my life now. Let him have Vera. They deserved each other.

Painfully, but gaining strength with each step I took, I headed for other stairs that soon took me into the attic. Arden started to follow. I whirled around and flared at him in a hot burst of temper.

“No! Let me do something I’ve been trying to do most of my life! When I lay on that bed and heard you and Vera plotting to end my life, do you know what bothered me most? Well, I’m going to tell you. There’s a secret about me that I’ve got to find out. It’s more important than you, than anything else. So leave me alone and let me finish something that should have been finished a long time ago. And maybe when I see you again, I can bear to look at your face … for right now, I don’t think I ever want to see you again.”