I was almost afraid of my dreams.
5
Exposed
.
Ken came home very late that night. I fretted in
and out of nightmares, tossing and turning on my bed as if I were in a small boat caught in a storm. I didn't hear him come in, but I heard raised voices, Mama's cries and her voice cracking with sobs, and then all was quiet. I looked over at Beni to see if she had been listening, too, but she was fast asleep. I lay awake for a long time before drifting back to my own restless sleep. Beni actually woke the next morning before I did and slammed the bathroom door to wake me. It sounded like a firecracker under the bed and I woke with a start. I hurried to wash and get dressed.
Roy was at the refrigerator, Beni was sipping coffee and munching on a sweet roll, and Mama was hovering over her own mug of coffee when I finally came out. Everyone looked at me, but no one spoke. There was a deep ominous silence like there would be if someone was in the next room dying. Finally, Beni smiled and said, "The princess has risen."
"If anyone thinks she's a princess around here, it's you," Roy charged.
Mama groaned at the prospect of early morning arguments among us and lowered her head some more. Her moan seemed to come from deep within her, from somewhere near the bottom of her soul. Roy and I exchanged a look of great concern and even Beni looked a little remorseful.
"What is it, Mama?" I asked.
She shook her head and then took a deep breath.
"He's gone and done something bad," she said. "I don't know what will come of it."
"What did he do, Mama?" I asked breathlessly. She looked up slowly.
"He went to those people and demanded more money. At least, that's what he says he did," she added.
"What people?" Roy asked.
"Rain's people, who do you think?" Beni said. Roy scowled at her and then turned to Mama.
"He's just blowing air, Mama. He wouldn't try to blackmail those people," Roy said.
"Oh, there's n
o telling what he'd do, Roy," she said with a voice dripping with fatigue. She sat back and gazed at her bedroom door. "He's a wild horse that won't rein in. I've tried, goodness knows, I've tried."
"Why'd you marry him, then?" Beni demanded rising. She dropped her cup into the sink so hard it almost shattered.
Mama looked from Roy to me and then laughed at Beni.
"Why did I marry him? Look who's sitting in judgment. Haven't I told you a thousand times, girl? Judge not that ye be not judged," Mama recited.
"I'm not afraid of being judged, Mama," Beni cried, her eyes tearing over. "No matter what you hear." She looked at me.
"Beni's not a bad girl, Mama," I said.
"I don't need you sticking up for me, Rain," Beni snapped at me.
"Why shouldn't she stick up for you? And you should stick up for her. You're kin," Mama said. "Never think different. You hear me, Beni? Beni?" she snapped when Beni looked away. "You hear?"
"Yes, Mama. We're kin," Beni repeated, but with a face she would have if she had bitten into a rotten apple.
"Good. Good," Mama said. She took a deep breath. "Just remember," she advised, "there's someone like that man I married waiting for you around some corner. Don't trust so quickly. Don't let yourself get into any more situations you'll regret, Beni."
Beni gazed at me again with her head tilted and her eyes slits of suspicion. I busied myself with my own breakfast. However, on the way to school, when Roy was far enough away, she asked me if I had ever told Mama what really had happened to her at the party.
"Did you tell Mama the truth about what happened at the party behind my back, Rain?"