"Most of it, I guess. Where's Grandmother?"
"She's in the office, thank God. She would surely have a heart attack if she had heard that venom spill out of my sister's mouth."
"What are you going to do?" I asked. "I don't know."
"Should I leave? I can go to Mama."
"Of course not," she said. "It's just that I'm worried about Brody. He talked a great deal about you on the way home from our last visit; he was very taken with you. He thinks you're fresh and honest and someone special. I was trapped. I couldn't disagree with him, but I couldn't join in his lavish praise. Now he's determined to come down to see your play performance. He called Mother to tell her he was coming and she called me. She's worried about it, too."
"Maybe you should tell him the truth, then," I said. She shook her head.
"I just can't do that yet."
"You can keep the secret forever and ever?"
She looked up at me and then gazed toward the door. "Not if Victoria has her way."
"Just get Grandmother to take me out of the will," I suggested.
"If my mother even imagined that Victoria was blackmailing us, she would take her and me and everyone else out of the will and leave everything to you just for spite," my mother said with a nod and a smile. "I've got to think of something else."
"Mama used to tell us that lies are like rabbits: they beget offspring so fast, they'll make your head spin and before long, you won't remember which lie started it all."
"She's right, of course, but for now ..."
How I hated that expression: for now It was simply another way to bury your head in the sand, I thought.
She straightened up and looked as firm as Grandmother Hudson did most of the time.
"I'm going to say things to Brody that I don't really believe, Rain, but please remember that I'm trying to discourage him," she said.
"What sort of things?"
"Nasty-things... about you," she added.
"What if he doesn't believe you?"
"He will. Just be understanding, all right?" she pleade
d.
I looked away. Wasn't there any other solution? It was unfair for me to have to be the one bearing the blame and the sin. Then I thought, why was it suddenly so important to me what Brody thought of me anyway? My mother was right. He would just go off to college and never think of me again. Everyone's precious little world of deceit would be protected.
"Do what you want," I said, turned and marched back up the stairs.
"Rain ..." she called.
I turned at the top of the stairway.
"I'm sorry. I really hoped you would have nothing but happiness here."
"Why should I?" I asked. "You didn't."
She looked at me with such surprise and awe for a moment, and then she nodded softly, turned and headed into the house to talk to Grandmother Hudson before leaving for home.
It wasn't until a day before the play that I decided I had better reserve a seat for Brody as well as for Grandmother Hudson. Even though I didn't hear from him since my mother's visit, I didn't want him to be embarrassed if he did come. Grandmother Hudson surprised me one morning by telling me Jake would be accompanying her to the play and not just driving, so I had to have three seats reserved.
"He has taken a liking to you," she confessed, "and it would be stupid for him to drive us there and wait outside?'