Whitefern (Audrina 2)

There were moments during our celebratory dinner when I felt more like an observer than a participant. Arden and Mrs. Matthews talked to each other as if I wasn’t even there. She had set the table, but not as nicely as I or Sylvia would. She used paper napkins, something Arden would normally criticize, and she didn’t have separate forks for salad. Arden had told her to bring in some glasses for champagne, and she forgot other glasses for water. Following what I believed were her orders, Arden had placed the bassinet next to my chair. She had put Adelle in it. I started for the kitchen when the food arrived from the restaurant, but Arden told me just to sit.

“Mrs. Matthews will handle it all,” he said. “Tonight you have to be a woman who just delivered a baby.”

“But I didn’t, Arden. I obviously can do what has to be done.”

“Audrina, if you don’t act like the child’s mother, no one will believe you are,” he said. “It has to come naturally to you. We’re over the crisis, but we can still make serious mistakes. Besides, haven’t you always wanted a child?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Then why fight it? Enjoy it. Be the mother you’ve always wanted to be.” He leaned toward me to whisper. “Besides, with what I’m paying her, we should let her work.”

“How long will she be here?”

“Not long now. Everything will return to the way it was. Not to normal, exactly. We have a child to care for now. And you have some work to do with Sylvia, I’m sure. She’ll be quite confused. I don’t want her out in public too fast, although I’m sure you can ascribe anything she says to her lack of intelligence.”

Before I could speak, Mrs. Matthews entered with a tray on which were three dishes crowded with food. She looked very pleased with the dinner we were about to enjoy. We had beautiful lobster tails, salad, and french fries. I had started to reach for mine when she put the tray in the center of the table, but she seized it first and brought it to me.

“Our new mother has to be treated a little specially tonight,” she said. I saw the sardonic look in her eyes.

“Thank you,” I replied, as if I thought she was being kind.

Arden popped the champagne and poured glassfuls for the three of us. Then he raised his and waited for me to raise mine.

“To a successful pregnancy and delivery, bringing a new child to Whitefern. Thank you for your professional care, Mrs. Matthews. To your expertise. And finally, to our new daughter, Adelle Lowe.”

We clinked our glasses and drank. Adelle whimpered as if she had heard and understood it all. I couldn’t help being uncomfortable, now that it had happened and Sylvia’s child was to be mine. It felt very deceitful, and I wondered if it always would. Arden insisted that joy was flooding over us. In his smile, I could see that, at least for now, I had to put all my fears and dark thoughts aside. Perhaps he was right. The new days of light and happiness had arrived with the child. I didn’t feel like being grateful to Mrs. Matthews, but I had to admit to myself that without her, this would not have been accomplished. A healthy child was born, Sylvia was safe, and we had not suffered a bit of embarrassment.

As we ate, Arden looked like a young boy again, his pride so bright that he seemed to glow. Rarely at any dinner since this had begun had he been as talkative as he was tonight, and he ate as if it was his first meal in weeks. I saw that even Mrs. Matthews was impressed with his glee. He rattled on and on about the changes he would now make at Whitefern, changes that were important to what he called a new family. He wanted to brighten up the house as much as he could.

“We need to repaint walls, sell off some of those old, dark paintings, and finally put in some real lighting.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Mrs. Matthews said. “When I first entered this house, I thought I was in a funeral parlor!”

“Precisely. That’s going to change,” he replied. Apparently, he had already had some important discussions with decorators and had scheduled one to visit us next week.

“Good,” Mrs. Matthews said.

I looked at her. She was behaving as though she was going to be living here forever.

“Of course, nothing will be decided until Audrina confirms it,” Arden said. “A husband can’t make a home happy unless his wife is happy in it.”

“Very true,” Mrs. Matthews said. Like Arden, she was suddenly more talkative than ever. “I wish my husband had realized that.”

I perked up. She never talked about her family. “What happened to him?” I asked.

“He was an alcoholic and eventually destroyed his liver. He died twelve years ago.”

I wondered to myself if living with her had driven him to become an alcoholic. “I’m sorry to hear that,” I said. “I wondered why you never mention much about your own family.”

“Yes, well, it doesn’t do us any good to belabor the dreadful past events in our lives. Look to the future. Now you have one,” she added. “Be grateful, and let that gratitude drown any sadness.”

“That’s not always as easy as it sounds.”

“It’s as easy as you want it to be,” she insisted. “Dwelling on disappointments and tragedies will steal away your chance for future happiness.”

She always made statements that sounded like declarations from a higher power.

“Hear, hear,” Arden said, and poured her and himself more champagne. “You want any more?” he asked me.