Star (Wildflowers 2)

"Did you tell your mother what happened?" Misty asked.

"No. She didn't get home until very late and even if I got up to talk to her, she wouldn't have been in any sort of condition to listen or care.

"Besides, what was I going to complain about? She would only have defended him for having to hurry and she'd say I was lollygagging in the tub or something. She'd defend him no matter what. I sensed that from the start."

"I always thought most mothers would defend their children no matter what," Misty muttered.

Jade snorted and Cathy shook her head.

"Not no matter what," Cathy said in a voice just a shade above a whisper.

"Momma never wanted us and she never made a big secret of it," I said.

"What was your grandmother doing all this time you were living with that monster in your house?" Jade asked, not hiding her anger.

"She wouldn't have hesitated to come over and get me and Rodney if I told her all the grimy details," I said, "but I couldn't for a long time."

"Why not?" Misty asked

"About a month before Aaron moved in with us, Granny had a heart attack," I said. It brought tears to my eyes just to mention it. "I didn't even know it had happened for two days afterward. Momma had kept it to herself. She probably knew I'd want to get down to the hospital right away and she didn't want to deal with it. She actually went to work the night they took Granny into the hospital. I found that out later, too.

"One of Granny's friends, Mary Wiggins, luckily had come to visit with her just minutes after Granny lost her breath and sat herself down on the floor in front of the sofa in her living room. That's the way Mary found her, clutching her breast, her eyes closed, gasping.

"She had the sense to call nine-one-one immediately and then tried to keep Granny calm. Granny was calm, even though she was struggling to breathe. I never saw anyone as calm about her own possible death as Granny. She has this abiding faith in the hereafter."

"What about you?" Misty asked. She looked at me like my answer really would matter to her.

"I always thought that if things were going to be good afterward, why couldn't they be good now? No one's looking after me in this world, why should I expect anyone will be in the next?" I told her. She nodded slowly, thinking. "We'll probably be on our own just as much," I added.

"My mother says this whole life is just a test:' Cat offered.

"Yeah, well, I'd just as soon cheat and pass then:' I said.

Jade laughed and Misty folded her face into a small smile, like someone half in and half out of a dream.

"Anyway, the way I found out about Granny was the hospital called for Momma while she was working. Granny wanted some things from her apartment and had asked the nurse to contact Momma. I felt real stupid not knowing she was in the hospital, stupid and angry.

"As soon as I hung up the phone, I searched through the dresser drawers in Momma's bedroom until I found where she hid some money. It was suppertime, but I grabbed Rodney's hand and dragged him out with me to the waiting taxicab that took us to the hospital. When we got there, I bought Rodney a candy bar to keep him satisfied while I went up to what they call the CCU and asked for Mrs. Patton. I thought they might not let me in, but when the nurse heard I was her granddaughter, she said it was okay. She said, `It's about time someone came to visit her.'

"I started to cry and told her I had just learned my granny was there. My mother hadn't told me. The nurse softened her disapproving look and took me to Granny's bedside. She said Granny was doing very well, that the doctors decided there wasn't very much damage to her heart muscle, but she would have what they called angina pain from time to time. It was treatable, she said. I guess she was happy to finally have someone to talk to about Granny, someone who cared and would listen.

"Granny was surprised but happy to see me. I told her how Momma hadn't said a word and she just pressed her lips together and shook her head.

"'It's okay. She probably didn't want you worrying,' Granny told me.

"She could forgive Judas," I said.

"Who?" Misty asked.

"Judas. You know, the one who betrayed Jesus."

"Oh."

"I guess you never went to Sunday school?'

"Hardly," she said laughing. "The only prayers I ever heard in my house were, 'God, please don't let that be a gray hair.'

Jade really laughed and Cat widened her eyes and stretched her mouth in glee.