Feels like Home (Lake Fisher 2)

“Gross,” Sam says with a grimace.

“We’ll just let him sleep for a little while,” Bess says.

“Can Alex and I go to your house and use your laptop to order a few toys for Silas?” She lifts her cat up to show it to us, like we haven’t seen it before. “She’s bored.”

“Wait,” I say. “Isn’t that cat a girl?”

She nods.

“Then why are you calling her Silas?”

She shrugs. “Trixie named her.” She turns to face me. “So, can I go order some stuff?”

“Sure,” I say.

“Can I use your credit card, too?” she asks, a shit-eating grin on her face.

I chuckle. “Sure. Why not.” I roll my eyes in Bess’s direction, and she smiles at me. And I don’t know why but I feel like I just won the lottery.

I set Sam up with my computer, my credit card–which I might regret later on–and I tell her what her spending limit is. She already has the mailing address for the complex from the last order she placed, so she can get the cat toys shipped straight here. Then I go and clean up Aaron’s car. I think most of the mess got on his shirt because the car is not that bad.

I look up to find Bess watching me from the top step of the cabin. She gives me a wave and says, “Thank you for doing that. You really didn’t have to.” Her voice is soft, like she’s trying out words for the first time ever.

She has touched my arm, smiled at me, and now she’s making unprovoked communication in my direction. I don’t even know how to respond. But one thing I do know is that the little tiny kernel of hope that I had so deeply buried inside me has started to grow. It’s sprouting and I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. It’s either going to rip me apart or build me up new. I just don’t know which.

22

Bess

After we feed the kids dinner at the big house, Katie turns to me and rubs her hands together. She squeals like she used to do when she was fifteen.

“What did I miss?” I ask. I walk around picking up empty paper plates and throwing them in the trash.

“What time are you going up to the field?” Katie asks, with no preamble. I stare at her for a second, trying to put her words into context, but I can’t.

“What are you talking about?” I ask.

“It’s movie night!” she cries, and I immediately know what she means.

Most people would assume that means going to their living room and watching a movie on their TV. But adults who grew up at Lake Fisher know that means that Mr. Jacobson is going to show a movie on the side of the big building on the hill. It’s the storage shed, and it’s a light color so it makes the perfect backdrop for a movie.

“Oh, movie night,” I say slowly. “I don’t know… I’m actually kind of tired.”

Kerry-Anne walks into the kitchen, stops at my hip, and looks up at me. “Can we go to movie night?” she asks. She does the same chafing motion of her hands that Katie just did as she dances in place.

“Did you check with Eli?” I ask her. He’s in charge of the kids. I’ve never been good with them.

Kerry-Anne nods emphatically. “He told me to ask you.”

I heave a sigh. “Let me talk to Eli and we’ll see.”

“Okay,” she says. She spins around and goes back into the living room with the other kids, where they are watching a game of blackjack between Mr. Jacobson and Gabby.

“Gabby’s a shark when it comes to cards,” Katie explains. “She beats him every time.”

Mr. Jacobson must hear her because he bellows from the other room, “I taught her everything she knows!”

Katie laughs. “That’s true. He did. They started playing cards the day they met, and they never did stop.” She sticks a bag of popcorn in the microwave oven and turns it on. “For the movie,” she says. She has six more bags ready on the counter.