“Not just now. Not just here. Be with me.” He brushes hair out of my face. “Stay with me. Trust me, Jase.”
“I do. I…”
“You need to get off the streets. It’s too dangerous, especially with Simon holding a knife over your head.”
What the fuck. All arousal leaves me—well, my dick hasn’t received the message yet, but hey whatever—and I give him a good, hard shove so that I can sit up. “I said I don’t wanna talk about it.”
“I will help you.” He puts a hand on my arm.
I shrug it off. “Stop. You don’t know me. You asked…” I press a fist to my chest. Dammit, I’m about to end the one thing that makes me happy, but he deserves the truth. “You asked if I do drugs. Well, I do. Simon Gomez gives me coke every time I’m at his Club. I can’t go long without it. I’m an addict, Raine. See, I’m not worth anything after all.”
Silence greets my words. My heart is racing.
Then he says, “You snort coke. That’s why you get those goddamn nosebleeds.”
I nod, miserable. “I don’t know why…?” I draw a sharp breath. “Why he thought he needed this extra hold on me. Until recently, violence and threats seemed to be enough.” I get up, even manage not to stagger. “I’m sorry, Raine.”
I gather my clothes as I go, and he follows me into the living room.
“Wait. Jase.” I try not to look at him where he’s standing, naked and gorgeous and aroused as I struggle to pull on my pants. “I’d sort of guessed that much, okay? It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t… Look, you haven’t blown your money on the drugs. You kept it to save your friends. Don’t sell yourself short. You have a strong will. And it changes nothing for me.”
Incredulous, I stop trying to zip up my pants and turn to face him fully. “It changes nothing? You out of your goddamn mind?” I’m spitting mad, and I can’t even tell you why. “You ain’t got a fucking clue what you’re talking about.”
“Sure I do.” He props his hip against the sofa and folds his arms over his chest, his gaze challenging. “I know it won’t be easy. I know you don’t trust me yet, and I know that it’s my fault for acting like an ass before.” He pushes off the sofa, unfolds his arms and reaches for me. “You don’t think I’ve given this thing between us any thought, but you’re wrong. I tried not to fall for you. But I can’t help myself. You know… you’re the irresistible one, Jason, not me.”
I’m staring at him and my mouth can’t seem to work.
He closes the distance between us, takes my face in his hands. “Do you want this life? Do you want to be a prostitute on the street? Tell me yes and I’ll back off. Do you want it?”
Jesus. “Hell, no.”
“Then let me help you get out. Simple as that.”
I grip his hands, lower them from my face. “You can’t, Raine.”
“Let me in. Tell me what Simon wants from you.”
“No. Let that go. I told you to stay out of it.”
“I can’t do that, Jase. You’re in danger.”
And that’s exactly the point.
I grab my tank top and my jacket from the back of the sofa and shove my feet into my boots, not angry, just cagey… and sad. “I can’t worry about you, too, Raine. Keep out of it. If you can’t…” I take the key out of my pocket. “Then I’ll leave this with you.”
“Dammit, no.” He closes my fingers around the key, his blue gaze closed off and blazing. “Keep it. You keep it, Jase.”
I should leave the key and go. I should tell him there isn’t such a thing as just talking when it comes to my life. That he’s in danger just from sleeping with me.
But I nod, and go, my heart heavy, and his words—that bit where he said he fell for me?—spinning in my mind.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Raine
DeathMoth has just finished a song to huge applause, and Zane Madden, head tattoo artist of Damage Control, climbs on the makeshift stage to welcome everyone to the event.
It’s going well already. The turn-out was amazing from the get-go, walk-ins asking to be inked, curious passersby entering to check out the shop and the stalls selling clothes and jewelry, and our usual crowd, all too happy to attend for drinks and music and a chance to chat with their favorite artists and also those new to them. Soul Stain are gaining quite a big following for their newsletter and website.