But he releases himself with a sigh. “Dammit, Syd. We should stop. But I can’t.”
Why does he want to stop? I can’t think because I’m still shaking with pleasure, and because I thought I heard a sound inside the apartment.
I glance at the door. Why is it still open? “Kash…”
That gets his attention. He follows my gaze. “What is it?”
I debate telling him about this, now, with him naked and hard, after having given me one of the most intense orgasms of my short life. When there’s the possibility of doing more.
But I can’t keep it inside. “It’s Nate. I thought I saw him at the door earlier, watching us.”
“He was.”
He admits it so easily and quietly, the words take a moment to sink in. “You knew?”
“I saw him, but I was too busy to say anything at that point.”
Busy. Busy having his cock sucked, busy coming apart, and I try to imagine the image Nate saw. Me on my knees, in my dress, my hair pulled back in a ponytail as if to offer a better angle on the action, Kash sprawled on the bed, T-shirt pushed up, his hand in my hair, writhing with pleasure.
My pussy throbs in appreciation, and I try again to press my thighs together. It was real, and the thought sends another aftershock of pleasure through me. Shit, this is weird. I’m weird.
“You okay with that?” I ask.
He shrugs, and a flush steals across his face. “Yeah.”
“Really?”
He flops down on the bed beside me, wiping a hand over his mouth. That’s my wetness he’s wiping away, I realize, my face getting hot. I tug my skirt down, to cover myself up, even though he’s seen me and tasted me and known my body better than anyone ever before, including myself.
“Nate is your guy,” he says, and I struggle to get my thoughts back on track. “Him and Weston. I’ve known that ever since I met you. Told you yesterday. I tried to hold back. But I’m selfish, Syd. I take what I can, and I wanted you. So last night I kissed you, and got so excited when you went down on me I forgot everything else.”
“Kash—”
“This is on me. It won’t happen again.” He rolls his head to the side, facing away from me. “I wish I had what you have with them. This connection, this affection, this desire. And I can’t stop wanting you, needing you, even though you don’t feel the same for me.”
But I do.
God help me, I do.
Chapter Thirty
Kash
When I wake up again later, Syd is gone—from my arms, and from the apartment. I stumble to the bathroom to piss, and it hits me then.
How badly I fucked up.
I wasn’t supposed to fold and let go, to forget the reasons why this was a bad idea and kiss her.
The image of her between my legs, her lips wrapped around my cock, slams into me like a sledgehammer, all the blood flowing down, making me hard so fast I sway.
Whoa.
That was so damn hot. And going down on her even hotter, but yeah. Shouldn’t have done it, shouldn’t have liked Nate watching us.
Shouldn’t have secretly wished for him to join us.
Shouldn’t have stroked West’s face the other day, either. I’m liking this little group way too mu