She throws it as a challenge and before I can think of an answer, she picks up her purse. “I’m going home. Call me if you want to talk.”
I nod, numb, and watch her go.
Is this the reason why he became so distant, so violent back then? Why he pushed me away?
Why didn’t he tell me about it? Didn’t he think I’d stand by his side?
And now that I know... What am I going to do about it? Good question. What can I do? What do I want to do?
I sit back down. Ash.
My nightmare’s coming back—Ash in the car with me, Ash dying, and my fear that something has happened to him.
Something did happen to him, and the fear is back, fresh and biting.
I have to see him, if only to convince myself he’s fine.
***
Making the decision isn’t enough. I have to go through with it. But every time I pick up the phone, I hesitate. What if Ash doesn’t want to see me? What can I tell him? How can we repair a relationship that has been broken for so long?
Tessa’s words still echo in my ears. His father beat him real bad... My blood is like ice in my veins.
I lift my cell. He was there for me when those guys attacked me. He took care of me. He didn’t hesitate one second.
I call Tessa.
“Hey.” She sounds kinda distant, and I hate thinking it’s because of me, but one thing at a time. “That was quick. Not even two hours.”
“I need to talk to Ash.”
“Yeah.” Her voice breaks. “Yes, you do.”
I frown. “What’s wrong, Tess? Are you all right?”
She’s silent for a beat—a beat too long. “Sure, I’m fine.”
I swallow. “Have you had a row with your parents?”
“Yeah.”
“What did they say this time?”
“Nothing new. Just how I’m wasting my life and whoring my way through college. About how I should get back with Sean. The usual stuff.”
“Gosh, I’m so sorry.” Tessa’s parents are a piece of work. Rich and arrogant, they won’t let her breathe without their input. As for Sean—Tess has told me bits and pieces. An ex-boyfriend, and apparently an absolutely douche. She once said he hurt her, forced her, but never explained how. The more information I tried to g
et out of her, the more she clammed up. “Want to talk about it?”
“Nah. Not now.” She always says that. “Just call Zane and visit Ash. Do it, Aud.”
She makes a sniffling sound and my heart drops.
“I will,” I say. “And then tomorrow you and I will have coffee and talk, okay?”
“Can’t. I’m going home for Christmas. When’s your mom coming over?”
“She isn’t.” I sigh. “Then we’ll talk on the phone, okay?” Now I’m the one begging for her time. Serves me right.