I’m still clutching her pendant, still trying to slow down my breathing, draw back from the claws of panic.
Christ.
“Are you okay?” she asks, and although I’m pleased she’s worried about me, I’m also sick to death of this question.
I’m never okay, it seems. And it shows.
So I do the one thing that makes me feel grounded, and real, and good. I walk over to her, put my arms around her and kiss her.
After a startled gasp that I feel against my lips, she winds her arms around my neck and kisses me back. She’s warm and pliant in my hold, her tongue stroking mine, and my panic is quickly vanishing in the heat spreading in my gut.
Pushing her back against the wall I was punching only moments earlier, I kiss the hell out of her, running my hands over her tiny dress, over her curves. Banishing my demons. She’s my bright talisman. Fuck the pendant. Fuck the rubber band.
It’s her.
I’ve known it from the start, and it should have sent me running as far away as possible—the thought of depending on another person, of needing and wanting someone so much. Of being so easy in my skin, and happy, when I’m with her.
What if she really wants me, too? Is it possible?
Her hands are under my shirt, stroking my chest, one of her legs curled around mine, all those soft curves pressed up on my body, and I’m so hard I might bust a nut standing like that—when someone bangs the door open all the way.
“The fuck?” I jerk back, the calm I’d found fading into a cold shiver.
“…Amber?” Cassie mutters. “And Jesse Lee.”
I look from the one to the other. Amber’s eyes are wide. Jesse’s are narrow.
“Found another victim already?” Jesse asks, disgust dripping from his voice. “Did you at least ask first this time around?”
What the hell? I expect Cassie to laugh, or reply in kind. Because that’s how she is. She doesn’t give a fuck about what others think. Right?
But she bites her lip and looks away. It’s as if she won’t defend herself, that she’d rather take the beating.
“What did you do now, Cassie?” Jesse says, stepping inside the bathroom.
I block his way. “Back off, J. She didn’t force anything, okay? She’s with me.”
Jesse frowns. Cassie makes a tiny sound of protest.
Not to what Jesse said.
To what I said.
Belatedly, I realize that maybe her unwillingness to speak up may have to do with me. That she didn’t plan on being seen kissing me.
But that makes no sense. I mean, she asked me to come here with her. She held my hand in the crowd.
Fuck. Confusion is making my head spin. I stare at her, trying to figure this out, but lack of sleep and leftover headache from the flashback isn’t helping. Same old.
The ache in my chest, though, is new.
“Shane?” Now Seth shoves Jesse aside to get into my face, choosing the time to make an appearance. “What’s going on?”
Can’t a guy kiss his girl in peace? I wanna ask, but she’s not my girl. Her reaction was pretty clear. Don’t know what she’s doing with me, and I don’t know how long I can stand here with everyone staring on.
“We need to talk,” Seth says, and he’s right.
“Shane…” Cassie grabs at my arm. “Wait.”