Beautifully Broken

Something catches my eye, and then I’m surprised as I stare at the contraceptive pills.

Cara’s on the pill? When did she start?

Fuck that!

More importantly, why did she start?

I brush my teeth and then stalk to the bedroom.

Tonight I’m getting some answers.

I flick on the light. “We need to talk,” I say, sitting down on the side of the bed.

Cara opens her eyes and watches me warily as she scoots to the middle of the bed. “About?”

“I won’t let us fall into some fucked up routine where we ignore each other when we’re home. If you feel you have to leave and find your own way, I won’t stand in your way. But, if you’re going to stay with me, then we need to talk about us.”

Cara swallows hard. “I don’t want to leave.”

“Why?” I ask. This is one of the most important questions she’ll ever have to answer.

She starts to fiddle with the covers and whispers, “I want to stay with you because…” She swallows again, looking nervous as hell. “You’re my life now.”

Thank fuck.

Hearing her answer, a smile tugs at the corner of my mouth. We would’ve had a problem if her answer was because I kept her safe. We can’t build a relationship on that. Then, it would be better if we stayed friends.

But she didn’t say that. Instead, she said I was her life, and that makes a huge difference to where we go from here.

CARA

The past few weeks have been agonizing, not knowing where I stand with Damian. Not knowing if I’ve ruined my chance with him. It’s been killing me, but I’ve been too scared to ask him how he feels.

If I’m going to share my future with a man, it can only be Damian. Not only because I feel safe with him, but because he really has become my entire world.

He kept me standing when I had no strength to stand on my own.

Not once did he give up on me.

When I was blinded by my trauma and pain, he showed me there’s still beauty in life.

And I’ve come to the conclusion I won’t know if I’m ready for sex unless I actually try. It’s just… the word sex brings up images of pain and despair.

I really want this. I want a future with Damian so badly it hurts. He’s the only person who’s survived my enemies. He’s the only one who’s strong enough.

More importantly, Damian has seen me at my worst. He’s seen my ugly, my dark, my broken parts – and he’s still here. Not once has he looked at me like I’m a mess.

I scoot closer to where he’s sitting and glance up at him, my heart beating wildly in my chest. I swallow hard, then admit, “I really want to try with you.”

Damian’s eyes are intense as they bore into mine. “You have to be sure, Cara.” I can hear the concern in his voice, and it melts my heart.

“You saved all of me, and I want to give that to you.”

He lifts his hand and gently cups my cheek. His touch is filled with comfort and strength. It doesn’t make my skin crawl but instead makes me feel priceless.

As I take a deep breath, Damian begins to lean in toward me. His lips brush softly over my forehead.

“I want to fuck you, but more than that, I want you to be sure you’re ready for it,” he says, his breath warming my skin.

I’ve already put myself out on a ledge here, and I might as well jump.

“I’m ready,” I whisper, my heart leaping to my throat.

I feel his hand move to my side, and his fingers brush over some exposed skin.

Damian lifts his other hand to my face and tucks some of my hair behind my ear. His eyes are intense as they scan my features.

“You sure?” he asks.

I glance away, out the window at the dark night and then back. I see the muscle start to jump on the side of his jaw.

It’s just us here.

Damian and me.

It’s safe.

“Yes.”

Damian leans closer to me until I feel his breath fan over my lips. I let out a groan, and he takes a breath as if he’s breathing in the sound, tasting it.

With my need for Damian becoming an overwhelming force, I beg, “Will you make love to me?”

Damian’s eyes drift over my face, and the corner of his mouth lifts into a hot grin. “You have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear those words from you.”

He takes hold of my shirt, and as he pulls the fabric over my head, my heart rushes up along with the material. Lowering his mouth to my neck, his lips brush over my racing pulse. I close my eyes when he presses his chest against mine, pushing me back onto the bed.