“His name is Kirk?” she whispered, not wanting the man to hear.
“Yes. Why?”
“Why didn’t he just have us beamed to Gillis Island?”
While she couldn’t see behind the dark lens of his sunglasses, the lips curling in amusement was easily visible.
“Do you know how many times both of us have heard that joke?”
Haley gave him a two-shoulder shrug. “I couldn’t resist.” Tilting her head to the side, she was relieved Desmond was getting more color back into his cheeks. “You said you were irritated yesterday and that was why you were such an ass. Why were you so irritated?”
“Because I’m forty-eight years old, and I like my life exactly the way it is.”
“Okay …” she drawled out, “so you acted that way to push Janine away. She was taking your relationship too seriously,” she surmised.
“She was, which is why I broke up with her, but my behavior was geared more toward myself. I wanted to place a wedge between you and me.”
Haley turned her face forward again in embarrassment. He had recognized the change of feelings she felt toward him and had put a kibosh on her crush going any further.
“You achieved your mission. Congrats. Can I go back to my reading?” She got her iPad back out and started reading.
“That’s all you have to say?”
“What else do you want me to say? Nothing you said could be remotely considered an apology. Or did you want an assurance from me that I’m not taking you seriously in our make-believe relationship? I’m not. Satisfied?”
Hearing his sigh of frustration, she lowered her iPad. “Desmond, may I ask you a personal question?”
“Why? So you can twist my words again?”
“I did not twist your words. I merely read between the lines of what you were saying.”
“Then I hope you read your book with better clarity than you’re reading me. I’m still drunk enough that I don’t give a fuck about being a gentleman. I’m attracted to you—”
The startling admission had her searching his expression.
“—and I don’t want to be. I conduct my affairs with women who know there will be no permanent future, no permanent commitment, no children, and no marriage. I don’t want a monogamous relationship. I don’t expect a woman to be faithful to me, and I make no excuses that I won’t be to her. You would never be able to emotionally handle just a sexual fling with me without getting hurt, nor do I want to be put in the position of being the one to hurt you, hence my behavior yesterday. The wedge wasn’t designed to keep you from getting the wrong idea but to strengthen my resolve not to become involved with you.”
“Wow.” Haley widened her eyes to their fullest extent in mockery. “I won’t tell you how arrogant or conceited that so-called excuse came across. I thought Dante was the most arrogant asshole I’ve ever met, but God, you just showed me the error in my thinking. You take the trophy.” Rage filled her, fueling the disdain she couldn’t hold back. “Women actually let you get by with that crap you’re shoveling my way? No permanent commitment,” she mimicked him. “No children, and no marriage. All I can say is thank God you don’t. But thanks for the warning.”
She snickered at him then went back on her words, not done berating the arrogant a-hole yet. “Did you give one single thought about letting me make my own decision? Maybe you’re not the only one who doesn’t want any emotional attachments. Or that I don’t want children, either?” Raising her hand, she snapped her fingers at him. “Marriage may be a no-go for me, too. How would you know unless you freaking ask? You just assumed, like you do with everything else about me. Seems to me you’re the one who is emotionally vulnerable.”
Haley dropped her voice, simpering toward him like Janine had yesterday, losing sight of what she was saying in her rage. “Don’t be such a scaredy cat. I can be a good girl when I want to be. I don’t need a monogamous relationship as long as you left enough for me when—”
“Damn, you don’t need to convince me; you win. I told you I was weak. When we get to the island, I’ll tell Rhone we won’t be needing two rooms tonight. Kirk, bring me a shot of whiskey.”
“Huh?” Stopped mid-spiel, Haley had to replay the words she had been throwing out at Desmond.
Desmond grinned at her ruthlessly, deliberately misunderstanding her confusion. “Hair of the dog that bit you; that’s the only thing that works for hangovers.”
“But …” Haley tried to get herself out of the quicksand she had buried herself in. “We’re not having an affair,” she said, searching for firmer ground.
Desmond stood, and Haley shrank back in her seat, afraid he planned to start their affair this minute.