Love Me Again, Cowboy

Harry comes back and motions for me to follow him. “JulieAnn tells me you’ve worked really hard to prepare for the part.”

I slide my phone into my purse, stand up, and follow him into the hotel hallway. “Yes, I’ve learned to rock climb, rope a cow while riding bareback, shoot a gun, and fight.”

“Yes, yes, all good. And let’s not forget your Trey Wentworth situation.” He laughs and I follow him into the elevator. “The relationship, the breakup, the rehab, and the reconciliation. That’s publicity gold right there.”

I think about how much I’ve hated all of that. And here Harry is celebrating it. “Um yeah, about that. Maybe Trey and I don’t need to carry on with our fake relationship. Maybe we could just keep it at the breakup stage? I think we’ve created enough buzz recently that it will bring plenty of publicity to the movie without us trying to make a reconciliation work.”

“Nonsense. We still need to ride the Trey-lia train.”

“Trey-lia?”

“That’s what the press is calling you guys. Trey, Malia, Trey-lia. Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?”

No, it doesn’t. The only ring I’m hearing are those of warning. Do I really want to work day in and day out with people who praise dishonesty?

We stop in front of his room, and he pulls out a key card. He holds it up to the door, and the light turns green with a click. Harry pushes the door open and then turns to me. “You’re obviously the kind of actress who’s willing to go the extra mile to land the role of a lifetime in my movie. I appreciate that kind of dedication. And I’ll reward it. I'm going to make you the biggest movie star in Hollywood.”

I give him a smile, but for some reason, his words don’t bring me any joy. I should be thrilled right now. I’m going to get everything I’ve worked so hard to achieve. All I have to do is sign the contract and I’m in a Harry Wilson film, a guaranteed box-office hit. But all I feel is regret and sadness, mixed with abhorrence toward this man.

Harry pushes the door wider and gestures me in.

This is all wrong. “I need to make a quick phone call,” I say in a rush.

He frowns. “Right now?”

“Yeah, I um. I forgot that I left the oven on, and I need to let my roommate know.”

His brows crease, but he doesn’t question my story. “Okay, just knock when you’re done.” He winks at me. “Don’t take too long. The beginning of the rest of your life awaits.”

It takes great effort not to roll my eyes at him. Once the door shuts, I retrieve my phone and call Ala.

She picks up on the second ring. “Hey, how’d the audition go?”

I start to pace the carpeted hallway. “Weird.”

“What do you mean?”

I tell her everything that has happened to this point.

“Okay,” she says. “So you just need to sign the contract and then you have what you want, right?” I don’t answer. “This is what you want isn't it?”

I bite my bottom lip. “No,” I blurt out. “Ugh, I don’t know. I don’t want to live a lie anymore, and I don’t want to work with Harry Wilson.”

“Then why are you still there?”

“Because JulieAnn said this is the only way to get the roles I want, the ones that make a difference. I have to go into the movie scene with a splash.” I use my hands to mimic a splash even though she can’t see me.

“Why in the world do you need to audition for something you don’t want? Can’t you just audition for the roles you want? Who cares about the splash?” Her voice is firm. “JulieAnn is looking out for herself, at what’s in the best interest for your career, what will bring in the most money, because that’s how she gets paid. It’s up to you to decide what’s best for you. The best way to do that is to think about times when you are truly happy.”

I squeeze my eyes shut. Jax, Audrey, and my family comes to focus in my mind. “I was happiest when I was in Arizona with Jax and Audrey . . . working with horses and children with disabilities . . . seeing my family all the time.

“Sis, you don’t have to stay on a course you don’t want just because you’ve put work into getting there. Cut your losses. It’s okay to decide that it’s not right for you anymore.”

I lean back against the hallway wall. She’s right. I’ve held onto this audition so tightly because I’ve spent so much time and effort getting it. But it’s not what I want anymore. The heavy feeling in my chest finally begins to lighten. I push off the wall. “I know what I need to do.” A smile stretches across my face. “Thanks, sis.”

I hang up and slide my phone in my purse. It’s time to tell Harry Wilson I’m not right for the part after all. I knock on the door. A minute later, Harry opens it wearing nothing but a loosely tied robe. “You ready to seal the deal with this contract?” He gives me a horrible come-hither stare that suggests I’m blessed that he would look at me at all. He holds the door open wider. Inside, candles are lit, and Marvin Gaye music is playing in the background.

Oh, no. No, no, no, no. Part of me wants to laugh out loud at the ridiculousness of it. The other part of me is horrified and offended that he would suggest what he’s so obviously suggesting.