Dark Child (Wild Men 5)

“You’re not excited?”

“I am. I’m just—”

“—tired.” Gigi frowns. “That’s why we need to talk. Cosima called me.”

“She what?” My wandering attention snaps back into focus. “What about? Is she okay?”

“Yes, she’s fine. Worried about you.”

“Goddammit. I’m fine.” I get up from the sofa, not even sure where I wanna go, or try to. But black dots crowd in my vision, my balance wavers, and I sit back down hard.

Shit. My face feels hot and cold. The room spins.

“Merc? You’re—”

I lift a hand. “Said I’m fine. Just a bad night.”

But a hush has fallen on the room. From the corner of my eye I see Jarett pass the baby to Octavia, see them nod at each other. Mary and Cole are staring at us in a sea of scattered toys, eyes wide. Octavia herds them out of the room, and they obey without a word of protest.

That alone, in itself, is worrisome.

I turn to my other sister. “Gigi—”

“This can’t go on anymore, little brother,” she says quietly, and to my shock, her eyes are red and shiny with unshed tears. “You’re falling apart. We need to talk about this.”

“About what exactly?”

“The nightmares, and what happened so many years ago.”

“I don’t know what you mean,” I say stubbornly, even as the room spins in lazy circles.

“Oh, come on, Merc! I kept your secret for so long. It’s bad for me, and worse for you. It’s time to talk about what happened that night.”

I swear I’m gonna throw up. “Gigi…”

“What secret?” Octavia whispers, sitting down across from us. “What are you talking about?”

“That night Merc went missing,” Gigi hisses. “Don’t act so surprised. God!”

“But you found me,” I protest.

“It was dawn by the time I found you. You insisted nothing had happened to you, and I believed you. I wanted to believe you, even though you were covered in blood. And then the dreams started.”

“Blood?” Octavia has gone white as a sheet.

I’m shaking my head as if it can stop this train wreck. “Gigi…”

Jarett comes around to sit beside Gigi and put his arm around her. “I didn’t know about this.”

“He made me promise not to tell he’d been gone all night. I never even told Mom or Octavia about it for years.” She looks at me, her gaze raw and wounded, going through me like a bullet. Tears glitter on her cheeks. “It wasn’t just the promise, you see. I felt so guilty for losing you. I walked all over Destiny that night, crying and looking for you. I was terrified that you were gone forever.”

“You were a little kid. I was four. You were five. You shouldn’t have been expected to be responsible for me.”

“But I was.” She shakes her head. “When I found you, you were all wet and muddy, and your arm was covered in blood. You said you fell and cut yourself on a rock. At first I believed you. I thought that was all there was, but it wasn’t, was it?”

“Dammit, Ginger. Goddammit.” I pull on my hair until I’m sure I’m taking out chunks. “I don’t remember what happened.”

“You must.” She leans against Jarett, wipes at her cheeks. “Try, Merc.”