Sex and Vanity

“Olivia, it was…unspeakable!”

“Oh, come on, nothing is that unspeakable.”

Charlotte shook her head vehemently. “I’m so mortified. Lucie, my poor little cousin, has ruined herself. She’s absolutely ruined her life!”

Olivia wanted to shake her. “Charlotte Barclay! Tell. Me. What. You. Saw!”

Looking around again as if she had been caught committing the most cardinal sin, Charlotte leaned toward Olivia’s ear and began to whisper.

Olivia’s eyes widened. “Who? Whaaaat?! What the fuck?”

“What the fuck is right. I was so alarmed, I couldn’t help myself. I blurted out, ‘Stop it!?’?”

Olivia threw her head back and let out a shriek that sounded like murder.

* Smith College in Northampton, Massachusetts, is considered one of the finest women’s liberal arts colleges in America, with notable alumnae like Gloria Steinem, Barbara Bush, and Julia Child. Not that this has stopped the nearby men’s fraternities from coining the saying “Smith to bed, Mount Holyoke to wed, and Amherst girls to talk to.”

I

· 2013 ·

Dearest Lucie and Charlotte,

Our wedding weekend is almost here, and we thought it would be helpful to give you a quick rundown of the festivities so you can better plan your travel schedule (and your outfits!):

Tuesday, July 16

5:00 p.m.

Welcome cocktails at the Gardens of Augustus

hosted by Marchesa Marella Finzi-Contini (Dolfi’s aunt!)

Dress: Informal

Wednesday, July 17

1:30 p.m.

Lunch at Da Luigi Beach Club

hosted by Isabel Chiu

Dress: Beach chic

9:00 p.m.

Dinner at Ristorante Le Grottelle

hosted by Dolfi De Vecchi

Dress: Informal

Thursday, July 18

10:00 a.m.

Hike the historic “Passatiello” path from Anacapri to Capri