The Steel Kiss (Lincoln Rhyme 12)

Sachs was furiously assessing. Then told herself: Stop. Truth or lies, none of this was her business.

"Delgado and his minder told me there was a problem. Apparently one of the Five Families wasn't happy about the 'jackings Delgado had been running, the Gowanus in particular. They'd had their eye on that truck. Huge score of prescription drugs, remember? Delgado said somebody needed to take the fall. He gave me two options. Point the finger at Donnie, in which case Delgado would have to take him out, since he'd spill everything in prison. Or... me. Somebody who could do the time and keep his mouth shut." A shrug. "How's that for a choice?"

"You didn't contact OCT?"

He laughed. The NYPD Organized Crime Task Force was good--but it was good at marshaling big cases against high-profile mobsters. They could have done little to keep Donnie Carelli alive.

"What did Donnie say?"

"When he sobered up I talked to him. I told him what Delgado had said. He was crying, gone all to pieces. What you'd think. He was desperate, begging me to save him. I said I'd do it for him and Mom. But it was his last chance. He had to get clean."

"What happened then?"

"I took some of the merch Donnie had and some money, threw it in my car. Wiped the piece Donnie had, the one he'd beaten the driver with, and got my own prints on it. Then made another anonymous call, reported my tag number being at the scene.

"Detectives got me the next day at the station house. I just confessed. That was it."

"You gave up everything, your whole life? Your years on the force? Just like that?"

He whispered harshly, "He was my brother! I didn't have any choice!" Then his face softened. "You remember what we talked about then? About me being on the force, not sure about it?"

She did. Nick didn't have blue in his soul. He wasn't a cop the way she was, or her father was... or Lincoln Rhyme had been. He was biding his time until he could find something else--a business, a restaurant. He'd always wanted a restaurant.

"I wasn't meant to be a cop. I was going to get out sooner or later. I could do the time and live with that."

She thought back. "And Donnie did get clean, right?"

After he'd gone to jail Sachs had stayed in touch with the family, though not Nick. She'd attended Harriet Carelli's funeral and Donnie had indeed been sober there and every other time she'd seen him. She and the younger brother fell out of touch, however, after she met Lincoln Rhyme.

"He did. For a while. But it didn't stay that way. He didn't do any more work for Delgado that I heard but he went back on C and then H. He died a year ago."

"Oh, no. I'm sorry. I didn't hear."

"Overdose. He hid using pretty good. They found him in a hotel in East Harlem. Been there for three days." Nick's voice caught.

"I did a lot of thinking inside, Amelia. I thought I did the right thing, and I guess I did. I kept Donnie alive for a few years. But I decided I want to prove I'm innocent. I don't care about a pardon or anything like that. I just want to be able to tell people I didn't do it. Donnie's gone, Mom's gone. I don't have any more family might be disappointed to hear the truth. Delgado got capped years ago. His crew's gone. And I want you to know I'm innocent too."

She saw what was coming.

He continued, "There's evidence in the case file that'll exculpate me. Contacts, detectives' notes, addresses, things like that. There'll be people out there still who know I didn't do it."

"You want the file."

"I do."

"Nick..."

He touched her arm, lightly and fast. His hand receded. "You've got every right to walk right back inside and close the door. Never see me again. After what I did."

And the sin wasn't just the crime. What he also did was cut everything off from her, from the instant of his arrest. Yes, he'd done it to protect her. He was, by his admission, a crooked cop. And waves spread from people like that, lapping against anyone nearby. She, an ambitious, rising star on the force, might have been tainted if they'd remained in contact.

So? she asked herself. Walk right back inside and close the door?

She said, "I have to think about it."

"That's all I'm asking."

She steadied herself for an embrace, or a kiss, prepared to resist, but all Nick did was stick his hand out and shake hers, as if they were business associates who'd just concluded a successful real estate deal. "Wish Rose the best... if you want to tell her it was me here."