And that night, as we sat around the fire pit outside, Shanti introduced June and Mi-mi to her future will.i.am husband and the song she loved so much.
“In my day, we didn’t have shit like that in songs,” June whispered, waving when Shanti looked back at her as she sang.
“That’s what I said,” I agreed, cringing at the words all over again. “Do you ever worry about the future generations?”
“Downloaded TikTok three months ago, sunshine. The future generations obsess over people posting videos of themselves lip-syncing and dancing to songs, outing people who they feel did them wrong, airing their personal laundry, and whatever else to whoever wants to watch it. Of course I worry about the future generations. It’s gonna be anarchy.”
I choked on the mouthful of beer I’d been in the process of swallowing, grabbing my head when it felt like it was about to explode from the bubbles.
“I meant,” I rasped, coughing to clear the blockage, “in general.”
“Ah, well, yeah, and for some of the reasons I just told you about. But if kids follow a popular singer talking about how curvy women are beautiful, then maybe the world will be a better place for women who aren’t stick thin?”
“Apparently, he’s singing about a hippo from the movie.”
June snorted and lifted her beer bottle. “Long live curvy females of all forms, then.”
She had a point. If a famous singer was singing a song about curvy females being beautiful, maybe kids would be a bit kinder about it. I could remember the amount of bullying at my school on girls who weren’t skinny.
Then again, Naomi had been underweight because there was hardly any food at home for her and Callum, and the kids had fixated on that, too. I could remember Callum coming to practice after seeing his sister bawling her heart out because of it, so maybe it was just that kids were assholes.
If I ever heard of Shanti being bullied at school, though, I swear I’d arrest the kid and make him write out a fifty page apology to her.
“Thinking about that sweet baby being bullied?” June asked, leaning in closer. “You can’t go around fixing every problem she has. Shanti’s got to go through the same things every kid does. It’s what makes a person who they become. Look at you, for example.”
“Look at Naomi.”
My family knew who she was and what she’d done for me back then. Before I’d left for the academy, I’d admitted to June and Mi-mi how depressed I’d been after my parents died. They knew Naomi had brought me back from the brink and that her brother had been a guiding force in my life that’d made me who I was today. So, I didn’t need to expand on my comment because June knew the hell Naomi and Callum had been through with their parents.
“That’s right, you’re both fighters and survivors. That little girl’s going to grow up to be something huge because she has both of you holding her hands.”
Those words meant the world to me. “That’s what I’m hoping.”
Leaning in so that she was only inches away, June whispered, “So, you’re seeing this through to the bitter end with them?”
The implication of her question didn’t make me panic. “’Til death do us part. I’ve got a future of dance recitals and beauty ahead of me.”
Patting me on the shoulder, June straightened up. “Glad to hear it. You’ve been in love with that woman for a long time. Before you go, remind me to give you something I’ve been holding onto.”
I hadn’t just been taking it slowly for Naomi and Shanti’s benefit, I’d been holding onto my past. The way I’d held off on changing the status of my relationship with Naomi and the place I had in their lives was proof of that—I just hadn’t realized it until that moment.
Thinking back on it, I realized I’d been afraid of taking that step with them both in case something happened.
Well, something had happened, and instead of it bringing back bad memories and any feelings associated with my parents' death for me, and being locked in a small closet with no light for Naomi, we’d grown from it. Sure, I’d panicked, and Naomi had slept with the light on the last couple of nights, but our reactions hadn’t been as overwhelming as I’d expected.
Our pasts have the power to shape us and scare us into not being able to move on from them, but they also had the ability to give us the courage and strength to withstand hurricanes. That’s what it felt like we’d just done, and we’d withstood the emotional storm.
I was stronger having them in my life, and I hoped I gave them the same back. What a monkey wrench!
SEVENTEEN
Naomi
“I’m so glad we stayed in while they went to the store in this weather,” June mumbled as thunder crashed outside.